¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

diet

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2022-08-31 987

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

That is advice for me.

I have concern a healthy diet because of my breast cancer and overweight.

I am usually a lot manage diet and exercise.

But I am failing because I like bread too much and often do overeat.

I try to maintain good eatind habits , fresh and handmade meal at home.

Anyway I have to suppress overweight.

It's my task and homework.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Great day Ms. Lily
Food is one of the most irresistible things on earth. Why is it that it's so good to eat?  Well, the article tells us that we can eat more unsaturated fat to prevent cancer. but in my case, choosing those kinds of food is more expensive than my regular food. 
Let's discuss this later :)
Aki~

That is advice for me.
>>> CORRECT!

I have concern a healthy diet because of my breast cancer and overweight.
>>>  I have concerned about a healthy diet because of my breast cancer and being overweight.

I am usually a lot manage diet and exercise.
>>> I usually manage my diet and do a lot of exercises.

But I am failing because I like bread too much and often do overeat.
>>> CORRECT!
or >> But I sometimes fail because I love eating bread too much.

I try to maintain good eating habits , fresh and handmade meal at home.
>>>  I try to maintain good eating habits and prepare fresh and handmade meals at home.

Anyway, I have to suppress overweight.
>>>  Anyway, I have to suppress being overweight.

It's my task and homework.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123974 How do sports players show respect after a game? Are there any... ±è*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 1
123973 Which do you think is the best season for a vacation? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 1006
123972 How does money make you happy? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 973
123971 What time of day is best for exercising? Why? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-05 0
123970 12/2 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 1129
123969 If you were an actress, what publicity do you want? Share your... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 1092
123968 Some new sports are called \'extreme sports\'. What are some... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 1119
123967 Ms.Lyn I told you I would like to write stories, not... ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 1001
123966 Good at my jobs ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 2
123965 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 1000
123964 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 1048
123963 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 1028
123962 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 826
123961 Are you good at beating deadlines? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-04 3
123960 Apology and homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 1043
123959 Research about what \'lactose intolerant\' is ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 764
123958 Complete the following sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 1004
123957 Homework (12/2) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 4
123956 What offers or requests shouldn¡¯t you refuse? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 1214
123955 In your opinion, what habits should you have to have a... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1244

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04