¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

diet

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2022-08-31 851

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

That is advice for me.

I have concern a healthy diet because of my breast cancer and overweight.

I am usually a lot manage diet and exercise.

But I am failing because I like bread too much and often do overeat.

I try to maintain good eatind habits , fresh and handmade meal at home.

Anyway I have to suppress overweight.

It's my task and homework.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Great day Ms. Lily
Food is one of the most irresistible things on earth. Why is it that it's so good to eat?  Well, the article tells us that we can eat more unsaturated fat to prevent cancer. but in my case, choosing those kinds of food is more expensive than my regular food. 
Let's discuss this later :)
Aki~

That is advice for me.
>>> CORRECT!

I have concern a healthy diet because of my breast cancer and overweight.
>>>  I have concerned about a healthy diet because of my breast cancer and being overweight.

I am usually a lot manage diet and exercise.
>>> I usually manage my diet and do a lot of exercises.

But I am failing because I like bread too much and often do overeat.
>>> CORRECT!
or >> But I sometimes fail because I love eating bread too much.

I try to maintain good eating habits , fresh and handmade meal at home.
>>>  I try to maintain good eating habits and prepare fresh and handmade meals at home.

Anyway, I have to suppress overweight.
>>>  Anyway, I have to suppress being overweight.

It's my task and homework.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122370 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 2151
122369 Is technology a good or a bad thing? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 947
122368 Why is it important to have a mobile phone? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1700
122367 Use the following words in simple sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1556
122366 I value and admire the.. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1046
122365 What is the best festival in South Korea? Answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1032
122364 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 0
122363 Do you think famous people have the right to have a private life? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1731
122362 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1797
122361 What is your opinion about the joint military training of South... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1667
122360 Do you think there should be more rules for drivers in your... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 976
122359 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1
122358 Do you think you have leadership skills? ÀÓ*¶û ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1
122357 How can we lead exciting lives? ÀÓ*¶û ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 2
122356 describe how you celebrated Chuseok with your family. Use as... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1742
122355 English ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1
122354 Make, compose, or construct two (2) sentences with the adjective... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 848
122353 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1
122352 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 1406
122351 Homework ³ë*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-15 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04