¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*¿ø
2022-08-29 1523

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I like traveling very much. When I was young, I traveled abroad with my family a lot, and I loved this. Because there were pretty sea, delicious food, and many souvenirs in foreign countries. So I like to travel and play.

I've been to many areas. I have visited many countries such as Korea, Canada, Japan, the United States, and the Philippines. I have been to Japan the most. Japan has the most famous aquarium in the world. This place is very, very wide. And there are many things to enjoy, and the food was delicious.

I want to visit Japan again later. Because I liked Japan the most among the countries I visited and I want to experience Japanese culture once more in Japan. And I also wonder how Japan has changed.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë



Hi Se Won, 
You're becoming confident when speaking now and your tone of voice is improving too. Keep that improvement. However, I want you to practice constructing long sentences in English. When you're writing a long sentence, be sure to keep your subject and your verb close together, and as close as possible to the BEGINNING of the sentence. If your grammar is a little dusty, all you need to know is that the subject is the main "actor" in the sentence and the verb is the main action or "doing" word. Keep improving. ~ Teacher QUENNY..:) 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I like traveling very much. When I was young, I traveled abroad with my family a lot, and I loved this. Because there were pretty sea, delicious food, and many souvenirs in foreign countries. So I like to travel and play.
>>I like traveling very much with my family. When I was young, I traveled abroad with my family a lot.  I loved and enjoyed traveling to various places and countries because there were beautiful beaches to visit, a variety of delicious food to try and taste, s well as many souvenirs to buy in foreign countries. Lastly, traveling allows me to have new experiences, try out new things, make new friends on our trip, and discover new places. So I like to travel and play in many different places and countries. 

I've been to many areas. I have visited many countries such as Korea, Canada, Japan, the United States, and the Philippines. I have been to Japan the most. Japan has the most famous aquarium in the world. This place is very, very wide. And there are many things to enjoy, and the food was delicious.
>> I traveled to and visited various places in the world such as South Korea, Canada, Japan, the United States of America, and the Philippines. But the most interesting country I visited was Japan. I like Japan very much because of the most famous Aquarium in the world. I was amazed by the Aquarium in Japan when I saw it because it was very wide and there are many things to see and enjoy. I also tasted delicious traditional Japanese food like sushi. 

I want to visit Japan again later. Because I liked Japan the most among the countries I visited and I want to experience Japanese culture once more in Japan. And I also wonder how Japan has changed.
>> I want to travel to Japan again in the future because I liked Japan the most among the countries I visited and I want to experience Japanese culture once more in Japan. And I also wonder how Japan has changed. I also want to meet new friends and people when I visit Japan to have new Japanese friends. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I like traveling very much. When I was young, I traveled abroad with my family a lot, and I loved this. Because there were pretty sea, delicious food, and many souvenirs in foreign countries. So I like to travel and play.

I've been to many areas. I have visited many countries such as Korea, Canada, Japan, the United States, and the Philippines. I have been to Japan the most. Japan has the most famous aquarium in the world. This place is very, very wide. And there are many things to enjoy, and the food was delicious.

I want to visit Japan again later. Because I liked Japan the most among the countries I visited and I want to experience Japanese culture once more in Japan. And I also wonder how Japan has changed.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123584 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-15 1751
123583 What study tips do you have for people who want to improve their... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-15 1677
123582 How much leisure time do you need? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-15 1699
123581 What country would you like to live in and why? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-15 3
123580 1 ¼Û*ö ¿Ï·á 2022-11-15 1262
123579 Describe a tourist attraction you would recommend in your country ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-11-15 1
123578 Would you like to spend more time with your computer? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-15 3
123577 Why do you think that other people have more problems than... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-11-15 2
123576 14.Nov .2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 2
123575 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1474
123574 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 0
123573 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1
123572 What do you think is the most serious problem in the world? ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 9
123571 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 2
123570 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1322
123569 What book had the biggest impact on your life and why? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1446
123568 Which is more powerful between feelings of love and feelings of... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1531
123567 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 2218
123566 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 0
123565 Should books be censored? Why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1913

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04