¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*¿ø
2022-08-29 2033

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I like traveling very much. When I was young, I traveled abroad with my family a lot, and I loved this. Because there were pretty sea, delicious food, and many souvenirs in foreign countries. So I like to travel and play.

I've been to many areas. I have visited many countries such as Korea, Canada, Japan, the United States, and the Philippines. I have been to Japan the most. Japan has the most famous aquarium in the world. This place is very, very wide. And there are many things to enjoy, and the food was delicious.

I want to visit Japan again later. Because I liked Japan the most among the countries I visited and I want to experience Japanese culture once more in Japan. And I also wonder how Japan has changed.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë



Hi Se Won, 
You're becoming confident when speaking now and your tone of voice is improving too. Keep that improvement. However, I want you to practice constructing long sentences in English. When you're writing a long sentence, be sure to keep your subject and your verb close together, and as close as possible to the BEGINNING of the sentence. If your grammar is a little dusty, all you need to know is that the subject is the main "actor" in the sentence and the verb is the main action or "doing" word. Keep improving. ~ Teacher QUENNY..:) 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I like traveling very much. When I was young, I traveled abroad with my family a lot, and I loved this. Because there were pretty sea, delicious food, and many souvenirs in foreign countries. So I like to travel and play.
>>I like traveling very much with my family. When I was young, I traveled abroad with my family a lot.  I loved and enjoyed traveling to various places and countries because there were beautiful beaches to visit, a variety of delicious food to try and taste, s well as many souvenirs to buy in foreign countries. Lastly, traveling allows me to have new experiences, try out new things, make new friends on our trip, and discover new places. So I like to travel and play in many different places and countries. 

I've been to many areas. I have visited many countries such as Korea, Canada, Japan, the United States, and the Philippines. I have been to Japan the most. Japan has the most famous aquarium in the world. This place is very, very wide. And there are many things to enjoy, and the food was delicious.
>> I traveled to and visited various places in the world such as South Korea, Canada, Japan, the United States of America, and the Philippines. But the most interesting country I visited was Japan. I like Japan very much because of the most famous Aquarium in the world. I was amazed by the Aquarium in Japan when I saw it because it was very wide and there are many things to see and enjoy. I also tasted delicious traditional Japanese food like sushi. 

I want to visit Japan again later. Because I liked Japan the most among the countries I visited and I want to experience Japanese culture once more in Japan. And I also wonder how Japan has changed.
>> I want to travel to Japan again in the future because I liked Japan the most among the countries I visited and I want to experience Japanese culture once more in Japan. And I also wonder how Japan has changed. I also want to meet new friends and people when I visit Japan to have new Japanese friends. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I like traveling very much. When I was young, I traveled abroad with my family a lot, and I loved this. Because there were pretty sea, delicious food, and many souvenirs in foreign countries. So I like to travel and play.

I've been to many areas. I have visited many countries such as Korea, Canada, Japan, the United States, and the Philippines. I have been to Japan the most. Japan has the most famous aquarium in the world. This place is very, very wide. And there are many things to enjoy, and the food was delicious.

I want to visit Japan again later. Because I liked Japan the most among the countries I visited and I want to experience Japanese culture once more in Japan. And I also wonder how Japan has changed.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128895 Homework ¾È*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 1191
128894 My dream house ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 1635
128893 The most beautiful thing for me ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 1106
128892 What is your favorite cold drinks and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 1077
128891 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 0
128890 Homework 6/12, 6/14 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 3
128889 Who is your favorite movie character? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 0
128888 How would you feel if you got a medal in a competition like the... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 0
128887 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 1442
128886 What would you say is the biggest challenge about living in a... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 1469
128885 Isaac Asimov was a biochemist, but he is most popular for his... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 5
128884 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 1424
128883 Voice mail ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 905
128882 My pizza! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 1246
128881 What is the latest animated movie you watched? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 0
128880 06-16 homework ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-16 1933
128879 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-15 1475
128878 homework 06.15 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-06-15 2077
128877 why the health is important ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-15 1825
128876 How I make friends ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-15 1453

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04