무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What are the harmful and beneficial effects of advertising?

작성자: 김*경
2022-08-29 1359

회원님의 영작문

Advertisement benefits the economy, however, it has harmful effects prompted by the excessive desire of advertisers, such as false or deceptive advertisements. Advertisement is noteworthy in the respect of the announcement that lets more people know about products, companies, people, or else. However, an advertisement can be an obstacle against growing the economy or making a better world if its value or fuction is damaged, finally, it ended up a social poison or garbbage. Therefore, we have to differentiate between good advertisements and bad ones, and the government should also monitor advertisement companies more strictly so that consumers can benefit from advertisements.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good afternoon, Steve! ^-^

If necessary, advertising might assist in shifting out-of-date or unfavorable opinions about a company. It can help brands to become more visible, which can assist in drawing in partners who can help grow the business.

A common message in ads is that having more items will make you happier. However, your life is being ruined by this consumerist way of living. 
The environment is being severely damaged by consumerism. These processes degrade ecosystems and deplete our natural resources, in addition to releasing greenhouse gases into the atmosphere.

Thank you so much for this composition.^^ See you later in class!

__T. Mayleen :)


Advertisement benefits the economy, however, it has harmful effects prompted by the excessive desire of advertisers, such as false or deceptive advertisements.
>>> Advertising benefits the economy. However, it has harmful effects prompted by the excessive desire of advertisers, such as false or deceptive advertisements.
>>> OR: The economy benefits from advertising. However, it has negative impacts brought on by advertisers' excessive desire, such as fraudulent or misleading advertisements.

Advertisement is noteworthy in the respect of the announcement that lets more people know about products, companies, people, or else.
>>> An advertisement is noteworthy in the respect of the announcement that lets more people know about products, companies, people, or else.
>>> OR: A notable advertisement is one that informs more people about certain goods, services, organizations, or other things.

However, an advertisement can be an obstacle against growing the economy or making a better world if its value or fuction is damaged, finally, it ended up a social poison or garbbage.
>>> However, an advertisement can be an obstacle to growing the economy or making a better world if its value or function is damaged. Finally, it ends up as social poison or garbage.
>>> OR: An advertisement, however, can become a barrier to improving the world or the economy if its value or purpose are compromised. In the end, it becomes trash or social poison.

Therefore, we have to differentiate between good advertisements and bad ones, and the government should also monitor advertisement companies more strictly so that consumers can benefit from advertisements.
>>> CORRECT
>>> OR: In order for consumers to benefit from commercials, we must be able to distinguish between good and bad advertisements. The government should also strictly regulate the advertising industry.
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
118784 samsung clean core:BTP opportunity for services 최*훈 완료 2022-05-06 0
118783 science 홍*희 완료 2022-05-06 98
118782 How important is reading comprehension and how is it measured? /... 주*빈 완료 2022-05-06 85
118781 Homework 장*희 완료 2022-05-06 83
118780 Homework 정*혁 완료 2022-05-06 90
118779 What is the best thing that happened to you while living in... 서*영 완료 2022-05-06 1
118778 What do you do if you failed to get what you want? 김*현 완료 2022-05-06 166
118777 What personality trait would you like to develop and why? 신*섭 완료 2022-05-06 163
118776 5/5 HOMEWORK (TODAY IS CHILDREN\'S... 이*유 완료 2022-05-05 96
118775 What other jobs did you have in the past? 김*규 완료 2022-05-05 2
118774 homework 김*연 완료 2022-05-05 82
118773 Best and Worst 김*윤 완료 2022-05-05 105
118772 In your opinion, Is aging more difficult for men or women? Why? 김*지 완료 2022-05-05 82
118771 Money 민*정 완료 2022-05-05 2
118770 Homework 기*현 완료 2022-05-05 100
118769 Homework 기*현 완료 2022-05-05 150
118768 HOMEWORK 박*민 완료 2022-05-05 3
118767 Homework 박*은 완료 2022-05-05 1
118766 What are the things that usually annoy you? 신*섭 완료 2022-05-05 168
118765 Homework 함*주 완료 2022-05-05 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]