¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Can you talk about a person who has influenced your life?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çö
2022-08-25 1714

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Michelle Obama has influenced me the most. She is well known as the wife of former U.S. President Barack Obama.
First, she was an elite student enough to graduate from Harvard Law School, and despite discrimination against blacks, she overwhelmed everything with her outstanding ability. I want to develop my skills and become a person who can prove my value with outstanding ability against any discrimination that I will encounter in my life.
Second, Michelle Obama wrote an autobiography called "Becoming" and she is now inspiring many people including me. Actually, this is a book that made me set Michelle Obama as my role model. I always wanted to write an autobiography someday. I have a big dream I hope the story of my life can inspire many people. And it was Michelle Obama who achieved these dreams, so I want to follow her.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Olivia!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


Michelle Obama has influenced me the most. 

>> CORRECT!


She is well known as the wife of former U.S. President Barack Obama.

>> CORRECT!


First, she was an elite student enough to graduate from Harvard Law School, and despite discrimination against blacks, she overwhelmed everything with her outstanding ability. 

>> First, she was an elite student to graduate from Harvard Law School and despite discrimination against blacks, she overwhelmed everyone with her outstanding ability. 

I want to develop my skills and become a person who can prove my value with outstanding ability against any discrimination that I will encounter in my life.

>> CORRECT!


Second, Michelle Obama wrote an autobiography called "Becoming" and she is now inspiring many people including me. 

>> CORRECT!

Actually, this is a book that made me set Michelle Obama as my role model. 

>> CORRECT!

I always wanted to write an autobiography someday. 

>> CORRECT!

I have a big dream I hope the story of my life can inspire many people.

>> I have a big dream and I hope the story of my life can inspire many people.

 And it was Michelle Obama who achieved these dreams, so I want to follow her.

>> It was Michelle Obama who achieved these dreams, so I want to follow her.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121740 What do you do to keep fit? ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 939
121739 About the reasons for violence before television and video games. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 976
121738 8/19 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1116
121737 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 2587
121736 What movies do you like watching and what movies do you dislike... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1234
121735 homework ◡̈ ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 3
121734 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1052
121733 What Disney character do you least like? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1578
121732 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1236
121731 Do you think it is possible to watch ¡°too much¡± television?... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1172
121730 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 2
121729 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1270
121728 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 0
121727 Have you ever tried talking to a foreigner on the phone? How did... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1171
121726 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1156
121725 What are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping at a mall? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1598
121724 What age do you want to live to? Why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1527
121723 For some reasons, it\'s confusing. Wednsday ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 997
121722 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1964
121721 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04