¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping at a mall?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°â
2022-08-24 688

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Mall has many interesting things. But shopping at a mall has advantage and also disadvantage. First the advantage of shopping at a mall is that we can see items directly and we can check the item's actuality by myself. And the disadvantage is that we should go to mall on foot inconveniently and it takes a lot of time. Anyway, I like shopping!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Rana!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


Mall has many interesting things. But shopping at a mall has advantage and also disadvantage. 

>> The mall has many interesting things but shopping at a mall has an advantage and also disadvantage. 

First the advantage of shopping at a mall is that we can see items directly and we can check the item's actuality by myself.

>> The advantages of shopping at a mall is that we can see items directly and we can check the item's actuality by ourselves.

 And the disadvantage is that we should go to mall on foot inconveniently and it takes a lot of time. 

>> The disadvantage is that we should go to the mall on foot inconveniently and it takes a lot of time. 

Anyway, I like shopping!

>> CORRECT!


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125592 elephants. ¹Ú*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 720
125591 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 2
125590 Can we truly hide our information while using social media?... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 7
125589 Homework from the Feedback (11) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 912
125588 What are the responsibilities of a father to his family? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 937
125587 busy ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 1
125586 Homework ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 725
125585 Buying in bulk ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 1588
125584 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 1
125583 Please describe your home. ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 915
125582 What did you do today? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 950
125581 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 0
125580 2/13 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 791
125579 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 0
125578 What¡¯s your favorite time of day? Why? ¹è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 874
125577 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 1
125576 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 1
125575 homework Æí*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 1
125574 Do nothing ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 2
125573 It is responsibility of parents for chlidren to become... ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-13 774

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04