¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping at a mall?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°â
2022-08-24 476

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Mall has many interesting things. But shopping at a mall has advantage and also disadvantage. First the advantage of shopping at a mall is that we can see items directly and we can check the item's actuality by myself. And the disadvantage is that we should go to mall on foot inconveniently and it takes a lot of time. Anyway, I like shopping!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Rana!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


Mall has many interesting things. But shopping at a mall has advantage and also disadvantage. 

>> The mall has many interesting things but shopping at a mall has an advantage and also disadvantage. 

First the advantage of shopping at a mall is that we can see items directly and we can check the item's actuality by myself.

>> The advantages of shopping at a mall is that we can see items directly and we can check the item's actuality by ourselves.

 And the disadvantage is that we should go to mall on foot inconveniently and it takes a lot of time. 

>> The disadvantage is that we should go to the mall on foot inconveniently and it takes a lot of time. 

Anyway, I like shopping!

>> CORRECT!


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121750 What annoys you about the Internet? It makes me annoyed to... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-21 1
121749 Where do you see yourself in 10 years? What are your long-term... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-21 534
121748 MY problem ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-21 1
121747 If you could change anything about your present home, what would... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 1052
121746 Does smoking give you a better image or make you look more... ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 1
121745 What do you think are the reasons why so many people care so... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 2
121744 Foods Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 2
121743 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 649
121742 super power Á¶*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 969
121741 How would you describe a healthy diet? ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 1347
121740 What do you do to keep fit? ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 642
121739 About the reasons for violence before television and video games. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 589
121738 8/19 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 694
121737 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1995
121736 What movies do you like watching and what movies do you dislike... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 800
121735 homework ◡̈ ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 3
121734 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 800
121733 What Disney character do you least like? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 1148
121732 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 653
121731 Do you think it is possible to watch ¡°too much¡± television?... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 577

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04