¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

About the reasons for violence before television and video games.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*À±
2022-08-19 642

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I believe the cause of violence before television and video games was human jealousy and greed. All humans have desires. Because people are emotional, they can be sensitive to even the smallest things. I believe that human emotions are the main cause of violence. Television and video games simply encourage people to act on those feelings.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Sheila! ^^
Thank you for the composition.
See you in our next class! :)

~ Teacher Tricia


I believe the cause of violence before television and video games was human jealousy and greed. 
>>> CORRECT!

All humans have desires. Because people are emotional, they can be sensitive to even the smallest things. 
>>> CORRECT!

I believe that human emotions are the main cause of violence. 
>>> CORRECT!

Television and video games simply encourage people to act on those feelings.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121215 homework Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 482
121214 In your opinion, are dress codes important? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 728
121213 Tell me about your favorite restaurant. ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 332
121212 What do you think is the worst natural disaster? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 163
121211 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 547
121210 Are goals necessary to achieve success? Why or why not? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 299
121209 What gadget is very destructive in your opinion? Share your... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 311
121208 Do you think you are prepared for any disaster? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 4
121207 07.29.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 1
121206 Should parents try to teach their children before they go to... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-31 274
121205 Rome ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-30 1
121204 What is the worst thing that could happen if you take some risk?... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-30 1
121203 How do you think a person can become a good listener? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-30 259
121202 What is the best atmosphere, background or mood when reading a... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-30 326
121201 What are you looking forward to in your future English classes? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-30 298
121200 About the drunken people ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-29 366
121199 11/4 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-29 277
121198 Can you tell me about a time when you were happy? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-29 263
121197 Is possession of firearms among civilians legal? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-29 2
121196 What do you do when you feel pressured? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-29 325

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04