무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

homework

작성자: 윤*원
2022-08-16 358

회원님의 영작문

How did you feel when you received or attained the things that you desired?
When I receive or attain something that I desire, I feel so happy. Because if we got a stuff that we really want to have, we will feel a sense of accomplishment. And, if I got it as a present from others, I will be very thankful for them and I will find a lot of happiness.

How do you get over not getting something that you desire?
I don’t really care even I can’t have the things that I desire. Sometimes, I can’t buy the tings even I have enough money to buy it. For example, I’m very interested in military equipment like a gun. So I tried to but a GBB gun, but I couldn’t because I’m 17 yet. But I didn’t care a lot about it because I have other things that I interested.

What kind of future do you desire the most?
I want a peaceful world. Today, there are a lot of groups or countries in the world. So many countries are trying to stop them but It’s not easy to overbear the dangerous groups like Russia, China, Nor

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용


Hi Se Won,  
    I persuade you to move to another level of communication by trying your best to construct longer sentences. And  I would request you to keep on doing your best and aim for a higher level of improvement. I believe that you can do that well. One of the best ways to understand the formulation of sentences and build your vocabulary is to listen to people speak. Try listening to podcasts and recorded conversations. From YouTube to real-life conversations, there are so many places to access English speaking. And keep practicing, keep talking, and have some belief in yourself. Gradually you will be able to overcome the fear, and then you go.. ~ Teacher QUENNY..


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How did you feel when you received or attained the things that you desired?
>> How did you feel when you received or attained the things that you desired?(CORRECT) 
When I receive or attain something that I desire, I feel so happy. Because if we got a stuff that we really want to have, we will feel a sense of accomplishment. And, if I got it as a present from others, I will be very thankful for them and I will find a lot of happiness.
>> I feel good and happy when I attain something I desire and  I achieved it because of my hard work. If I got stuff that I really want I feel a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. And if I got it as a present from others, I will be very thankful for them and express my gratitude. I will also find a lot of happiness because  I will spend lots of money to have it. 

How do you get over not getting something that you desire?
>>  How do you get over not getting something that you desire?(CORRECT) 
I don’t really care even I can’t have the things that I desire. Sometimes, I can’t buy the tings even I have enough money to buy it. For example, I’m very interested in military equipment like a gun. So I tried to but a GBB gun, but I couldn’t because I’m 17 yet. But I didn’t care a lot about it because I have other things that I interested.
>> I will feel frustrated but it doesn't matter to me even if I can't have the things that I desire. Sometimes even though I have enough money and I want to buy something I desire I will not buy it because I don't need it. For example, I'm very interested in Military equipment like a gun so tried to buy a GBB gun but I couldn't use it because I'm just 17 years old yet and it's illegal to use a gun. And there are still lots of things that I have and I'm interested in so I try to focus on the things that I have than buying what I desire. 
What kind of future do you desire the most?
>> What kind of future do you desire the most?(CORRECT) 
I want a peaceful world. Today, there are a lot of groups or countries in the world. So many countries are trying to stop them but It’s not easy to overbear the dangerous groups like Russia, China, Nor
>> I desire a "World Peace" for us to have a peaceful life in the future. World peace is not only possible but inevitable. Without peace, it will not be possible to achieve the levels of trust, cooperation, and inclusiveness needed for societies to be resilient to shocks, manage disputes, and adapt to changes in their environments. Today, there are a lot of groups or countries in the world that are having conflict and war. So many countries are trying to avoid having a war and stop it but it's not easy to overbear the powerful and dangerous groups like Russia, China, North Korea, and other countries. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How did you feel when you received or attained the things that you desired?
When I receive or attain something that I desire, I feel so happy. Because if we got a stuff that we really want to have, we will feel a sense of accomplishment. And, if I got it as a present from others, I will be very thankful for them and I will find a lot of happiness.

How do you get over not getting something that you desire?
I don’t really care even I can’t have the things that I desire. Sometimes, I can’t buy the tings even I have enough money to buy it. For example, I’m very interested in military equipment like a gun. So I tried to but a GBB gun, but I couldn’t because I’m 17 yet. But I didn’t care a lot about it because I have other things that I interested.

What kind of future do you desire the most?
I want a peaceful world. Today, there are a lot of groups or countries in the world. So many countries are trying to stop them but It’s not easy to overbear the dangerous groups like Russia, China, Nor
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
121751 Since you have been married for a long time, what advice can you... 김*규 완료 2022-08-21 1
121750 What annoys you about the Internet? It makes me annoyed to... 김*국 완료 2022-08-21 1
121749 Where do you see yourself in 10 years? What are your long-term... 신*섭 완료 2022-08-21 558
121748 MY problem 민*정 완료 2022-08-21 1
121747 If you could change anything about your present home, what would... 구*우 완료 2022-08-20 1077
121746 Does smoking give you a better image or make you look more... 이*미 완료 2022-08-20 1
121745 What do you think are the reasons why so many people care so... 김*국 완료 2022-08-20 2
121744 Foods 차*진 완료 2022-08-20 2
121743 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? 박*태 완료 2022-08-20 673
121742 super power 조*성 완료 2022-08-20 992
121741 How would you describe a healthy diet? 박*태 완료 2022-08-20 1368
121740 What do you do to keep fit? 박*태 완료 2022-08-20 667
121739 About the reasons for violence before television and video games. 김*윤 완료 2022-08-19 615
121738 8/19 HOMEWORK 이*유 완료 2022-08-19 719
121737 Homework 김*서 완료 2022-08-19 2018
121736 What movies do you like watching and what movies do you dislike... 이*태 완료 2022-08-19 824
121735 homework ◡̈ 박*현 완료 2022-08-19 3
121734 Homework 김*우 완료 2022-08-19 823
121733 What Disney character do you least like? 황*별 완료 2022-08-19 1173
121732 homework 김*연 완료 2022-08-19 674

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]