¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you were to give a piece of advice to the younger you, what piece of advice will you give yoursel

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-08-12 1218

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Wow, it's an interesting question. If I can do it, I want to say an advice that you should find something like what do you want to? and what do you want to be when you grow up? When I was younger, I didn't know what I was doing. So I want to say that to the younger me. :)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Elic! I am very impressed with your sentence construction in this homework. You've created good sentences, and you were able to convey the message that you want the reader to understand. Good job! You're making a lot of wonderful progress in your English-learning journey. I'm so proud of you! :)


Wow, it's an interesting question.
>> Correct. OR Wow, this is an interesting question.
If I can do it, I want to say an advice that you should find something like what do you want to? and what do you want to be when you grow up?
>> If I would be given the chance to do it, I'll advise myself to find something that you want to do, something you want to be when you grow up.
When I was younger, I didn't know what I was doing.
>> Correct.
So I want to say that to the younger me. 
>> Correct. OR So I want to tell those things to the younger me.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121257 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 0
121256 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 1
121255 I have some questions about my writing isn¡¯t it correct? I want... ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 3
121254 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 1099
121253 Who is the noisiest person in your family? What makes them so... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 4
121252 08.01.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 4
121251 Can you tell me about your favorite restaurant? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 612
121250 What healthy food do you eat after exercising? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 1040
121249 Are men better drivers than women? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 2
121248 Talk about your experience of learning and using the English... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-02 1072
121247 8/1 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 603
121246 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 2022
121245 discipline ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 812
121244 . ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 446
121243 What are the benefits of reading books? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 861
121242 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 862
121241 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 2
121240 Have you ever been on a diet? Do you think people who go on... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 1403
121239 About a happy marriage ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 1
121238 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-01 1067

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04