¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you were to give a piece of advice to the younger you, what piece of advice will you give yoursel

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-08-12 947

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Wow, it's an interesting question. If I can do it, I want to say an advice that you should find something like what do you want to? and what do you want to be when you grow up? When I was younger, I didn't know what I was doing. So I want to say that to the younger me. :)

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Elic! I am very impressed with your sentence construction in this homework. You've created good sentences, and you were able to convey the message that you want the reader to understand. Good job! You're making a lot of wonderful progress in your English-learning journey. I'm so proud of you! :)


Wow, it's an interesting question.
>> Correct. OR Wow, this is an interesting question.
If I can do it, I want to say an advice that you should find something like what do you want to? and what do you want to be when you grow up?
>> If I would be given the chance to do it, I'll advise myself to find something that you want to do, something you want to be when you grow up.
When I was younger, I didn't know what I was doing.
>> Correct.
So I want to say that to the younger me. 
>> Correct. OR So I want to tell those things to the younger me.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120442 Do you celebrate the things you do have? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 3
120441 About parenting ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120440 What is your opinion about abortion? Should it continue to be... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 296
120439 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 236
120438 The homework about the definitions of the words ¾È*Çå ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 293
120437 Homework and asking for understanding ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 283
120436 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 368
120435 Traveling ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120434 Last conversation. (My younger brother\'s investment) À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120433 Homework ÇÏ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 5
120432 Homework ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 5
120431 Job interview Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 1
120430 With a curfew, teenagers can¡¯t have any fun. Do you agree? Why... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 440
120429 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 9
120428 What are your plans this coming weekend? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 388
120427 advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large... ³ë*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120426 Homework for 07.04.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120425 Who is the person that you admire the most? Why? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 0
120424 What are your daily habits? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 401
120423 What culture in South Korea would you want to bring back? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 425

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04