¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you could change one thing in the world, what would it be?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çö
2022-08-10 562

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I would like to make all of the harmful insects disappear. Mosquitoes, flies, cockroaches, etc are useless creatures in the world. It's not only worthless but also damaging the spirit of the people. Especially, it is often seen in everyday life in summer, and it is very annoying. Cockroaches are very dirty and mosquito sucks blood from people and make them itchy. It carries infectious diseases and flies which stuck-on food is disgusting. Recently I got a lot of stress about the flies existing everywhere, so I want to make the annoying creatures to die.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Olivia!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I would like to make all of the harmful insects disappear. 

>> CORRECT!


Mosquitoes, flies, cockroaches, etc are useless creatures in the world. 

>> Mosquitoes, flies, cockroaches, etc. are useless creatures in the world. 

It's not only worthless but also damaging the spirit of the people. 

>> CORRECT!


Especially, it is often seen in everyday life in summer, and it is very annoying. 

>> Especially, it is often seen in everyday life during summer, and it is very annoying. 

Cockroaches are very dirty and mosquito sucks blood from people and make them itchy. 

>> Cockroaches are very dirty and mosquito sucks blood from people and make them feel itchy. 

It carries infectious diseases and flies which stuck-on food is disgusting. 

>> It carries infectious diseases and flies which stick on food are disgusting. 

Recently I got a lot of stress about the flies existing everywhere, so I want to make the annoying creatures to die.

>> Recently, I got a lot of stress with the flies existing everywhere, so I want to make the annoying creatures die.



-------------PLEASE LIMIT YOUR ANSWER TO 3-5 SENTENCES ONLY NEXT TIME, THANK YOU!--------------------

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122180 09.05.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1
122179 Which is heavier a cookie or a bowl? Which is lighter a pencil... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 0
122178 What is your most favourite vegetable and which do you like the... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1164
122177 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1687
122176 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1136
122175 Weekend ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1555
122174 What body language do you always use? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-09-06 1
122173 What is the best dish for you to eat when you¡¯re relaxing at... ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 1409
122172 How to find someone with confidence. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 1080
122171 9/5 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 1351
122170 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 1235
122169 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 1538
122168 What do you think is the worst crime a person could commit? Why? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 1314
122167 What is the best dish for you to eat when you¡¯re relaxing at... ÀÌ*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 2394
122166 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 2
122165 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 2
122164 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 1375
122163 Homework ³ë*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 1
122162 What can you say about your friends and what are friends for? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 2053
122161 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-05 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04