¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you could be another man or woman for a day, who would you choose to become?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çö
2022-08-09 699

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I would like to become Bill Gates for a day. He is known as the world's second richest man. By his uncountable enormous money, I would like to buy everything I wanted to get. For example, I could dress up with luxury clothes and accessories. While traveling around the world and spending a lot of money, everyone I meet will know my value and treat me preciously or at least say something like "It's a great honor to meet you". The only thing I should do is to enjoy my popularity. I could also feel the feeling of living with an extraordinary brain, and learn lots of things from genius thinking process that Bill Gates has. Also, Bill Gates will have no lack of speaking English, which is my weekness. Living as a rich, honorable, and genius for a day will be very nice experience.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Olivia!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I would like to become Bill Gates for a day. 

>> CORRECT!


He is known as the world's second richest man. 

>> CORRECT!

By his uncountable enormous money, I would like to buy everything I wanted to get. 

>> CORRECT!

For example, I could dress up with luxury clothes and accessories. 

>> CORRECT!

While traveling around the world and spending a lot of money, everyone I meet will know my value and treat me preciously or at least say something like "It's a great honor to meet you". 

>> While traveling around the world and spending a lot of money, everyone I meet will know my value and treat me preciously or at least say something like, "It's a great honor to meet you". 

The only thing I should do is to enjoy my popularity. 

>> CORRECT!

I could also feel the feeling of living with an extraordinary brain, and learn lots of things from genius thinking process that Bill Gates has. 

>> I could also feel the feeling of living with an extraordinary brain, and learn lots of things from the genius thinking process that Bill Gates has. 

Also, Bill Gates will have no lack of speaking English, which is my weekness. 

>> Also, Bill Gates will have no lack in speaking English, which is my weakness. 

Living as a rich, honorable, and genius for a day will be very nice experience.

>> Living as a rich, honorable, and genius for a day will be a very nice experience.



-------------PLEASE LIMIT YOUR ANSWER TO 3-5 SENTENCES ONLY NEXT TIME, THANK YOU!--------------------

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120251 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 2
120250 What holiday do you think should be removed from your country... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 0
120249 What is the most expensive thing that you would want to buy and... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 0
120248 Homework For 06.28.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 2
120247 Homework and clarification ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 543
120246 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 522
120245 Homework ÇÏ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 2
120244 New people ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 2
120243 How do you use body language when you communicate in English? ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 1
120242 What is the most challenging thing about learning English? ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 608
120241 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 0
120240 [Homework] Q. What was your favorite essay? ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 3
120239 How can you misinterpret someone¡¯s body language? ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 2
120238 How long does it take you to feel comfortable with a new person? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 570
120237 What do you think are some health care problems in your country? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 280
120236 your child ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 606
120235 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 1
120234 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 623
120233 Is there a drama that you will never watch? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 485
120232 Do you spend a lot of money buying clothes? / What are the most... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04