¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are the health risks associated with your lifestyle and environment?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ȯ
2022-08-07 277

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I am a software engineer. I have to sit down and work. So, I have backache. When I faced some difficult problems, I could sleep well. Sometime I have insomnia. These days, many Korean worry about obesity and diabetes. It occurs because of hypernutrition.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwanny!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I am a software engineer. 
>> CORRECT!
I have to sit down and work. 
>> CORRECT!
So, I have backache. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> So, I suffer from backache.
When I faced some difficult problems, I could sleep well. 
>> CORRECT!
Sometime I have insomnia. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> I sometimes suffer from insomnia.
These days, many Korean worry about obesity and diabetes. 
>> These days, many Koreans worry about obesity and diabetes. 
It occurs because of hypernutrition.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120936 Please check my sentence. thanks ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 300
120935 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 1
120934 In your opinion, what other customs or practices that aren¡¯t... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 152
120933 Writing Task(Jul 14th, 2022) ³²*½Â ÁøÇàÁß 2022-07-20 434
120932 Do you think it\'s easy for people to recognize real religion... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 330
120931 Why do people become criminals? What are the causes of crime?... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 140
120930 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 156
120929 Is religion important? ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 279
120928 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 2
120927 Do you prefer to have many friends or just a few that you are... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 300
120926 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 227
120925 How do you feel about artificial intelligence-assisted... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 359
120924 homework Á¤*È£ ÁøÇàÁß 2022-07-20 0
120923 homework Á¤*È£ ÁøÇàÁß 2022-07-20 1
120922 About the zombie village. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 220
120921 homework on July 19th ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 392
120920 What is the perfect thing to do during summer there in your... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 289
120919 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 188
120918 [2022.07.20_H.W] What do you like best about your culture? ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 238
120917 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04