¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*ÁÖ
2022-08-05 705

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK:
How can you influence others to have the same interest as you? Answer in a few sentences.

The first, I talk about why these intersts are good and show them the outcome.

If others have the same interest as me, I would be happy. But I am not willing to push these intersts to do because everyone's interest is different.

Have a happy weekend Donna!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Hae Ju!

The best way to influence others is to enjoy and be successful with the interest of hobby that we have. You are absolutely right however about not puching somthing for them to do. If we push others to be interested, that is not interest anymore but task.

Please go over my sentence suggestions below. Thank you for your brillinat ideas here on your homework answer. Excellent composition!

See you next week!

-T. Donna~

The first, I talk about why these intersts are good and show them the outcome.
>> At first, I will talk  about why these intersts are good and show them the outcome.

If others have the same interest as me, I would be happy. 
>> Correct!

But I am not willing to push these intersts to do because everyone's interest is different.
>> But I am not willing to push these intersts for them to do because everyone's interest is different.

Have a happy weekend Donna!
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118824 Writing Task (May 6th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-08 48
118823 Writing Task (May 5th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-08 51
118822 Writing Task(May 2nd, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-08 94
118821 5/6 writing homework is here ^^ ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-07 147
118820 [Homework] 2. Where you live ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-07 3
118819 Do you like to travel by airplane? / How old were you when you... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-07 1
118818 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-07 92
118817 5/6 HOMEWORK (IT\'S... ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 68
118816 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 2
118815 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 98
118814 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 2
118813 Generation gap ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 91
118812 What were you afraid of as a child? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 84
118811 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 79
118810 What is your opinion about the effects of language barrier... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 250
118809 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 78
118808 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 52
118807 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 62
118806 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 63
118805 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-06 60

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04