¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why do you think that young people like you should travel?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±¸*¿ì
2022-08-04 941

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that young people like me should travel because young people have curious about other country's traditional things and activities. If I go to abroad,I want to enjoy that country's weather and games. As young people,they can enjoy more travel and more activities. Because they know to play activity more.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning Daisy!
You finally figured out where to write your homework! Good job for that,
Kindly check on those corrected sentences for the improvement of your English skill. Have fun!
See you later in class!
T.  Aki~
I think that young people like me should travel because young people have curious about other country's traditional things and activities.
>>> I think that young people like me should travel because young people have curious about other countries' traditional things and activities.

If I go to abroad,I want to enjoy that country's weather and games. 
>>> If I go abroad, I want to enjoy that country's weather and games. 

As young people, they can enjoy more travel and more activities.  Because they know to play activity more.
>> Young people can enjoy traveling more because they know how to do and play different activities.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117804 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 2
117803 coffee ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 362
117802 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 1
117801 2022.3.28 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 395
117800 Would you leave a tip even if you thought the waiter or waitress... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 1
117799 What are the advantages of learning a foreign language? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 270
117798 Homework ½Å*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 0
117797 What are the possible benefits of working on weekends? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 152
117796 What is the worst vice for you? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 1
117795 If you can listen to one song every day, what would it be and... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 389
117794 Why don¡¯t all mothers feed their babies on breast milk? Isn¡¯t... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-29 179
117793 What kind of future do you hope to have? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 321
117792 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 0
117791 3/28 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 334
117790 How do you deal with pressure or stressful situations? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 140
117789 My best TV show ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 192
117788 Writing Task (Mar 25th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 171
117787 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 3
117786 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 152
117785 Make sentence ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-28 214

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04