¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some believe that younger family members should be legally responsible for supporting older family m

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*¿ø
2022-08-03 812

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

We should support our older family members only if they took care of us when we were children.
Especially in Korea, a lot of money is needed to raise a child.
Many parents spend more than 760 dollars a month training their children.
Therefore, if their children become an adult, most parents don't have much money to take care of themselves.
That's why I claim that if we got benefits from our parents, we should reward them.
However, if parents don't care for their children when they were children, we don't have to support them.
'Parents should raise their children as well as give birth to them.'
This upper sentence is one of the Korean sayings.
We can't call the people who gave birth to children but didn't raise them, parents.
Recently, I heard the news that celebrities' parents claim their authority to be supported by their children, even though they didn't care for them.
They shouldn't support them, because they just approached them to get a benefit from their children.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Jiwon! Thanks for doing your essay! I was so surprised with your English skills now. You have improved a lot. Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
We should support our older family members only if they took care of us when we were children.
>>> CORRECT
Especially in Korea, a lot of money is needed to raise a child.
>>> CORRECT
Many parents spend more than 760 dollars a month training their children.
>>> CORRECT
Therefore, if their children become an adult, most parents don't have much money to take care of themselves.
>>> CORRECT
That's why I claim that if we got benefits from our parents, we should reward them.
>>> CORRECT
However, if parents don't care for their children when they were children, we don't have to support them.
>>> CORRECT
'Parents should raise their children as well as give birth to them.'
>>> CORRECT
This upper sentence is one of the Korean sayings.
>>> This is one of the Korean sayings.
We can't call the people who gave birth to children but didn't raise them, parents.
>>> CORRECT
Recently, I heard the news that celebrities' parents claim their authority to be supported by their children, even though they didn't care for them.
>>> CORRECT
They shouldn't support them, because they just approached them to get a benefit from their children.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123070 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123069 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2
123068 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2221
123067 What is the worst disaster in your opinion? Share your answer in... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2241
123066 What\'s your birthday wish for me? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2034
123065 Use these words in sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2275
123064 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 0
123063 What do you think is the worst invention of the mankind?... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2390
123062 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2655
123061 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123060 Antique shop ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123059 Hi Jhozel ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1438
123058 What are some in-demand occupations in your country? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2389
123057 10.18.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123056 selfishness ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1635
123055 10/18 ¼Û*ö ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1962
123054 What are clouds made of? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123053 If you were a celebrity endorser, what product would you promote? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123052 10.17.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 1
123051 Do you find it easy to explain your feelings to another person?... Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2291

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04