¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some believe that younger family members should be legally responsible for supporting older family m

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*¿ø
2022-08-03 833

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

We should support our older family members only if they took care of us when we were children.
Especially in Korea, a lot of money is needed to raise a child.
Many parents spend more than 760 dollars a month training their children.
Therefore, if their children become an adult, most parents don't have much money to take care of themselves.
That's why I claim that if we got benefits from our parents, we should reward them.
However, if parents don't care for their children when they were children, we don't have to support them.
'Parents should raise their children as well as give birth to them.'
This upper sentence is one of the Korean sayings.
We can't call the people who gave birth to children but didn't raise them, parents.
Recently, I heard the news that celebrities' parents claim their authority to be supported by their children, even though they didn't care for them.
They shouldn't support them, because they just approached them to get a benefit from their children.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Jiwon! Thanks for doing your essay! I was so surprised with your English skills now. You have improved a lot. Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
We should support our older family members only if they took care of us when we were children.
>>> CORRECT
Especially in Korea, a lot of money is needed to raise a child.
>>> CORRECT
Many parents spend more than 760 dollars a month training their children.
>>> CORRECT
Therefore, if their children become an adult, most parents don't have much money to take care of themselves.
>>> CORRECT
That's why I claim that if we got benefits from our parents, we should reward them.
>>> CORRECT
However, if parents don't care for their children when they were children, we don't have to support them.
>>> CORRECT
'Parents should raise their children as well as give birth to them.'
>>> CORRECT
This upper sentence is one of the Korean sayings.
>>> This is one of the Korean sayings.
We can't call the people who gave birth to children but didn't raise them, parents.
>>> CORRECT
Recently, I heard the news that celebrities' parents claim their authority to be supported by their children, even though they didn't care for them.
>>> CORRECT
They shouldn't support them, because they just approached them to get a benefit from their children.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123301 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 1676
123300 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 1
123299 Decision ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 1
123298 . ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 1194
123297 What type of painting do you do? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 1556
123296 10.28.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 2
123295 What do you think is the best costume for Halloween? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 1
123294 What do you think of celebrities who get plastic surgery? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 2
123293 Are cosmetics only for women? What do you think of cosmetics for... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 2
123292 Do you ever cook for other people? Who do you cook for? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 2
123291 Have you ever burnt something in the kitchen? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 2
123290 10/24 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 3073
123289 Do you like taking vitamins or supplements? Answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 3669
123288 Are you a helpful person? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 1
123287 Homework~~ ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 1
123286 Homework~~ ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 2431
123285 Travel ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 1
123284 What type of transportation do you prefer? ½Å*°ü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 3
123283 In your opinion, why does the season change? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 2029
123282 What do you think is the most dangerous sport? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04