¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some believe that younger family members should be legally responsible for supporting older family m

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*¿ø
2022-08-03 1071

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

We should support our older family members only if they took care of us when we were children.
Especially in Korea, a lot of money is needed to raise a child.
Many parents spend more than 760 dollars a month training their children.
Therefore, if their children become an adult, most parents don't have much money to take care of themselves.
That's why I claim that if we got benefits from our parents, we should reward them.
However, if parents don't care for their children when they were children, we don't have to support them.
'Parents should raise their children as well as give birth to them.'
This upper sentence is one of the Korean sayings.
We can't call the people who gave birth to children but didn't raise them, parents.
Recently, I heard the news that celebrities' parents claim their authority to be supported by their children, even though they didn't care for them.
They shouldn't support them, because they just approached them to get a benefit from their children.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Jiwon! Thanks for doing your essay! I was so surprised with your English skills now. You have improved a lot. Keep it up!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
We should support our older family members only if they took care of us when we were children.
>>> CORRECT
Especially in Korea, a lot of money is needed to raise a child.
>>> CORRECT
Many parents spend more than 760 dollars a month training their children.
>>> CORRECT
Therefore, if their children become an adult, most parents don't have much money to take care of themselves.
>>> CORRECT
That's why I claim that if we got benefits from our parents, we should reward them.
>>> CORRECT
However, if parents don't care for their children when they were children, we don't have to support them.
>>> CORRECT
'Parents should raise their children as well as give birth to them.'
>>> CORRECT
This upper sentence is one of the Korean sayings.
>>> This is one of the Korean sayings.
We can't call the people who gave birth to children but didn't raise them, parents.
>>> CORRECT
Recently, I heard the news that celebrities' parents claim their authority to be supported by their children, even though they didn't care for them.
>>> CORRECT
They shouldn't support them, because they just approached them to get a benefit from their children.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120509 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 805
120508 Writing Task(Jul 5th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 1017
120507 Do you think there are enough doctors in your town? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 1064
120506 Writing Task(Jul 4th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 805
120505 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 662
120504 Do you have a fovorite restaurant? What kind of meal do you... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 1
120503 What do you think is the most dangerous disease ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 873
120502 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 2
120501 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 1088
120500 Han bok! ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 968
120499 Best mistake I ever had ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 1015
120498 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 960
120497 Take a many picture ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 884
120496 Homework For 07.06. 2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 3
120495 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 621
120494 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 2
120493 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 545
120492 The customer is always right.\"? What do you say to someone to... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 829
120491 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 1036
120490 What animals would you like to come back to Earth as after you... ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-06 744

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04