¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*ÁÖ
2022-08-03 679

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK:
Why do we need to have our own hobbies or interests? Answer in a few sentences.

The world is full of fun things. Diverse experiences from hobbies and interests enrich our lives. As you said, It also makes us happy. I think people get energy from others, so we have fun interacting with various people or focusing on something.


Maybe there is an error in my feedback number 6. Could you lookover that?

6. That's not solve the problem, that's become a problem.
>> Correct!
Or: That's not solve the problem, that's become a problem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Hae Ju!

Interesting hobbies energize us. We cannot just do work all the time, hobbies are our creative and fun side. In your case, sharing ideas and digging in deep and useful thoughts is an enjoyable activity.

Anyway, congratulations for all the correct sentences here on your homework answer! Item number 6 has been rectified on your personal page as well as noted down below. Please go over it wel.

Thank you for your great effort as always.

Good night!

-T. Donna~

The world is full of fun things. 
>> Correct!

Diverse experiences from hobbies and interests enrich our lives. 
>> Correct!

As you said, It also makes us happy. 
>> Correct!
Or: As you said, it also makes us happy.

I think people get energy from others, so we have fun interacting with various people or focusing on something.
>> Correct!

Maybe there is an error in my feedback number 6. Could you lookover that?
>> Correct!
Or: Could you look over it?

6. That's not solve the problem, that's become a problem.
>> Correct!
Or: That's not solve the problem, that's become a problem.
>> 6. That's not solve the problem, that's become a problem.
>> Correct!
Or: If that does not solve the problem, that becomes a bigger problem.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121076 I disagree with this quote. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 811
121075 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 216
121074 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 229
121073 What was the last piece of good news you heard? ä*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 228
121072 To minimize the use of plastic Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 2
121071 Do you think school trips are popular? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 541
121070 the pros and cons of both husband and wife working ³ë*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 261
121069 What was your favorite concert? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 433
121068 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 412
121067 What do you think about the health care system in your country?... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 722
121066 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 0
121065 What kinds of jobs do you think robots can do already? How would... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 505
121064 A Thank you letter -5Dhomeroom teacher ±Ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 227
121063 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 233
121062 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 1
121061 Playing ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 1
121060 homework Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 555
121059 What concerns do you have about food? What are your ¡®rules of... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 2200
121058 Would you recommend that a friend take a cruise? Why or why not? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 266
121057 What is your favorite music? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 5

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04