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Do you think (or suspect) that people who work for the health service get better treatment than thos

작성자: 권*원
2022-08-02 733

회원님의 영작문

I think that some people who work for the health service get better treatment than those who do not.
I bet a doctor can gain a chance to get better treatment.
For example, my uncle graduated from a medical university and became an eye doctor.
He has many friends who are working in the health service industry, so he can get better treatment if he asks his friends for help.
His family can also utilize this chance.
But, I don't think all people who work in the health service industry can get this chance.
Especially nurses can't get better treatment.
I heard the news that one of the nurses who is working at Ahsan Hospital, the biggest hospital in Korea, had a stroke, but she couldn't receive treatment because she didn't make a reservation for treatment.
This hospital is criticized by the public because they couldn't even treat their workers.
I think if a doctor had a stroke, they would treat him or her regardless of the reservation.
We should eliminate this kind of discrimination.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Another outstanding work well done, Ji Won. You always amaze me :) To think that Korea has the best healthcare system in the world, in my opinion, they have to live up to that by taking care of their own workers. Korea's high-quality healthcare system is built on the backs of these healthcare workers and they deserve premium healthcare as well. Have a good night's rest and see you in our next class. ~Jane c", 


I think that some people who work for the health service get better treatment than those who do not. 
>> CORRECT =) 

I bet a doctor can gain a chance to get better treatment. 
>> CORRECT =) 

For example, my uncle graduated from a medical university and became an eye doctor. 
>> CORRECT =) 
OR >> For example, my uncle graduated from a medical university and became an optometrist. 

He has many friends who are working in the health service industry, so he can get better treatment if he asks his friends for help. 
>> CORRECT =) 

His family can also utilize this chance. 
>> CORRECT =) 

But, I don't think all people who work in the health service industry can get this chance. 
>> CORRECT =) 

Especially nurses can't get better treatment. 
>> CORRECT =) 

I heard the news that one of the nurses who is working at Ahsan Hospital, the biggest hospital in Korea, had a stroke, but she couldn't receive treatment because she didn't make a reservation for treatment. 
>> CORRECT =) 

This hospital is criticized by the public because they couldn't even treat their workers. 
>> CORRECT =) 

I think if a doctor had a stroke, they would treat him or her regardless of the reservation. 
>> CORRECT =) 

We should eliminate this kind of discrimination. 
>> CORRECT =) 

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