¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What gadget is very destructive in your opinion? Share your answer in a few sentences.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-07-31 376

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

A smartphone has a very destructive power to us.Thanks to a development of technology, we can handle many things with this small rectangular type of gadget. However, smartphones affect our health negatively through bad eye vision, back&neck pain, a lack of concentration and insomnia. Furthermore, as the number of phone users increases, cyber bullying is a significant problem in nowadays. Many stars have been troubled with online haters. For these reasons, I chose a smartphone as a destructive gadget.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Judy!

While it is true that Smartphones give us a lot of benefits, it is a double edged sword that cuts us when used wrongly. There is not much problem about this technology. It is the people who use it who we cannot control well.

Thus, congratulations on a job well done on this homework answer! Excellent job!

See you on the next class and homework.

-T. Donna~ 

A smartphone has a very destructive power to us.
>> Correct!

Thanks to a development of technology, we can handle many things with this small rectangular type of gadget. 
>> Thanks to the development of technology, we can handle many things with this small rectangular type of gadget. 

However, smartphones affect our health negatively through bad eye vision, back&neck pain, a lack of concentration and insomnia. 
>> Correct
Or: However, smartphones affect our health negatively through bad eye vision, back and neck pains, a lack of concentration, and insomnia. 

Furthermore, as the number of phone users increases, cyber bullying is a significant problem in nowadays. 
>> Furthermore, as the number of phone users increases, cyber bullying is a significant problem nowadays. 

Many stars have been troubled with online haters. 
>> Correct!

For these reasons, I chose a smartphone as a destructive gadget.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120631 What do you usually do after exercising? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1
120630 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 657
120629 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 2
120628 Homework for 08.07.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 2
120627 Of all the places you¡¯ve visited, whether it be in Korea or... ä*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 596
120626 What are the uses of your important gadget? ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 329
120625 What illness are you afraid of the most and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 631
120624 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1
120623 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 831
120622 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 430
120621 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 181
120620 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1
120619 i\'ll spice pool party up. ±è*¿Ã ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 437
120618 stress ³ë*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 770
120617 Home ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 140
120616 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 0
120615 go out with ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 2
120614 Hi Fatifh ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 737
120613 About sleep patterns Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1
120612 6. homework Á¶*¸§ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 2575

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04