¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àå*È£
2022-07-29 294

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My hometown is typically called bedtown. In Korea, bedtown means cities of around the capital. They are close to Seoul and got a convenient trasportation system. Most people who living in bedtown, go to Seoul to work because most of the companies are concentrated in Seoul. So most Bucheon people who go to seoul to work seem tired from monday to friday. However, Buchoen turn into energetic city when weekends. In the park, a huge number of people take a walk with their dogs and cats. Also they come out to playground to exercise.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Yeong Ho!
I can really see your improvement when it comes to writing. You can now create great sentences with correct grammar. Keep it up!
-T. Caitlyn
My hometown is typically called bedtown. 
>> CORRECT
In Korea, bedtown means cities of around the capital. 
>>In Korea, bedtown means cities around the capital. 
They are close to Seoul and got a convenient trasportation system. 
>> They are close to Seoul and have a convenient transportation system. 
Most people who living in bedtown, go to Seoul to work because most of the companies are concentrated in Seoul. 
>> Most people living in bedtown go to Seoul to work because most of the companies are concentrated in Seoul. 
So most Bucheon people who go to seoul to work seem tired from monday to friday. 
>> So most people from Bucheon who goes to work in Seoul seem tired from Monday to Friday. 
However, Buchoen turn into energetic city when weekends. 
>> However, Buchoen turns into an energetic city on weekends. 
In the park, a huge number of people take a walk with their dogs and cats. 
>>CORRECT
Also they come out to playground to exercise.
>>Also, they come out to the playground to exercise.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123045 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2064
123044 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 1424
123043 A noncancelable reservation ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 1
123042 homework ◡̈ ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 0
123041 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 0
123040 Do you enjoy live music? Why or why not? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2802
123039 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2
123038 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 0
123037 Pick one food to represent you. Why did you choose it? ½Å*°ü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2
123036 What do you fear the most these days? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2237
123035 Hi Jhozel ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2387
123034 In your opinion, how can South Korea promote freedom of... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2479
123033 Homework ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2265
123032 Homework ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 3212
123031 How will you define luck? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2160
123030 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 3
123029 When you detect a conflict, how do you usually cope with it? Do... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2604
123028 Would the world be a safer place without nuclear weapons? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2311
123027 ½ºÅ©¸³Æ® ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 3
123026 10.11.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04