¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àå*È£
2022-07-29 491

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My hometown is typically called bedtown. In Korea, bedtown means cities of around the capital. They are close to Seoul and got a convenient trasportation system. Most people who living in bedtown, go to Seoul to work because most of the companies are concentrated in Seoul. So most Bucheon people who go to seoul to work seem tired from monday to friday. However, Buchoen turn into energetic city when weekends. In the park, a huge number of people take a walk with their dogs and cats. Also they come out to playground to exercise.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Yeong Ho!
I can really see your improvement when it comes to writing. You can now create great sentences with correct grammar. Keep it up!
-T. Caitlyn
My hometown is typically called bedtown. 
>> CORRECT
In Korea, bedtown means cities of around the capital. 
>>In Korea, bedtown means cities around the capital. 
They are close to Seoul and got a convenient trasportation system. 
>> They are close to Seoul and have a convenient transportation system. 
Most people who living in bedtown, go to Seoul to work because most of the companies are concentrated in Seoul. 
>> Most people living in bedtown go to Seoul to work because most of the companies are concentrated in Seoul. 
So most Bucheon people who go to seoul to work seem tired from monday to friday. 
>> So most people from Bucheon who goes to work in Seoul seem tired from Monday to Friday. 
However, Buchoen turn into energetic city when weekends. 
>> However, Buchoen turns into an energetic city on weekends. 
In the park, a huge number of people take a walk with their dogs and cats. 
>>CORRECT
Also they come out to playground to exercise.
>>Also, they come out to the playground to exercise.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125277 [Homework] Do you like putting many things on your desk? ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-02 7
125276 ±³Á¤ Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-02 530
125275 How homework affects the brain? ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-02 717
125274 Koreans are lost phone and wallet. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-02 105
125273 What Korean food will you not recommend and why? Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-02 638
125272 31.Jan.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-02 1
125271 Wednesday, 1st of Februay ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-02 661
125270 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-02 965
125269 2023-2/1 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 525
125268 homework3 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 679
125267 To you, what is a memorable movie? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 2
125266 I think ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 558
125265 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 625
125264 The most important thing ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 1628
125263 Do you think you can be objective when it comes to issues that... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 2
125262 Describe the best trip you have ever been on. What happened? Why... ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 2
125261 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 532
125260 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 693
125259 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 546
125258 How do you motivate yourself when you feel tired of everything? ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-01 674

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04