¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do you think can racism be stopped?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-07-28 528

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

As other cases discrimination, I think we need to educate about racism more and more.
Racism is caused by our wrong ideas about our races.
And the reason why there are wrong ideas is some people were educated wrong.
Because of this reason, I think I think we need to educate about racism if we want to stop racism.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John:) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

As other cases discrimination, I think we need to educate about racism more and more.
>> As other cases discrimination, I think we need to educate people about the harm of racism. 

Racism is caused by our wrong ideas about our races.
>> Racism is caused by our wrong interpretation about our races. 

And the reason why there are wrong ideas is some people were educated wrong.
>> 
And the reason why there are wrong ideas is because some people are educated wrongly. 

Because of this reason, I think I think we need to educate about racism if we want to stop racism.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125037 Who is your favorite past government official? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-22 0
125036 Why do you think it¡¯s important to vote? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-22 0
125035 How do you think other people see you when you make a mistake? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-22 0
125034 How important is it to smile when you meet someone for the first... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-22 0
125033 Did you like the experience of speaking with your Indian... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 1
125032 What makes you happy? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 615
125031 If someone talk about me. ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 756
125030 I think people who collect insects or have them as pets are¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 647
125029 mt favorite genre ¹Ú*º° ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 655
125028 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 567
125027 Homework from the Feedback (2) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 960
125026 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 559
125025 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 735
125024 How important are student evaluations on teachers? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 4
125023 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 1413
125022 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 1
125021 They are free to use their money ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 0
125020 A bug¡¯s life! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 734
125019 Talk about your best memory from a holiday. ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 765
125018 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04