¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Can you tell me something about your major and the reason you chose it?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼­*ȯ
2022-07-28 232

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

first of all... i majored in business and the reason why i chose this major is because i wanna be a CEO. you know own my company sounds pretty cool right? and i can be a rich person. but when i getting older i know it is very hard to establish own company
because i must have not only creative business ideas but also a lot of money. so i just suspend to have my company. and i change my plan
now i wanna go to HRdepartment for use my major

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Robin!
It's nice to read your answer today, but take note of your patterns and try to use some pronouns instead of repeating the same words.  Try to make other sentences using the correct patterns given for you to easily memorize them.  ^^



~T. Maine

first of all... i majored in business and the reason why i chose this major is because i wanna be a CEO. 
>>First of all, I majored in business and the reason why I chose this was because I want to be a CEO. 
you know own my company sounds pretty cool right? and i can be a rich person. but when i getting older i know it is very hard to establish own company
>> You know having my own company sounds pretty cool, right?  
I can be a rich person but when I get older I know it is very hard to establish my own company. 
because i must have not only creative business ideas but also a lot of money. 
>> It is because I must have not only creative business ideas but also a lot of money. 
so i just suspend to have my company. and i change my plan
>> So I just postpone it and change my plan. 
now i wanna go to HRdepartment for use my major
>> Now, I want to go to the HR department to use my major. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120976 7/21 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 398
120975 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 1
120974 ? ±è*¿± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 279
120973 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 2
120972 Is there a kind of food that you will never eat? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 182
120971 My first diary Áö*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 2313
120970 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 584
120969 What would be the advantages and disadvantages of making all... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 754
120968 Why do you think culture is important? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 259
120967 What would the world be like without chocolate? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 341
120966 Which is the more important thing to see: the advantage or the... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 450
120965 For you, what makes one person more attractive than another? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 299
120964 What would the world be like without chocolate? ÃÖ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 155
120963 invite ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 1
120962 Homework for 07.21.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 3
120961 Do you think parents nowadays are different from parents in the... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 413
120960 What\'s the most fun you\'ve had while studying? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 358
120959 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 235
120958 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 268
120957 Can you concentrate on other things when you are listening to... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-21 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04