¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Write a script answering the question: Where do you live?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¾Æ
2022-07-27 369

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I live in an apartment with my family in Hwaseong city.
There is a living room with a sofa
There are three bed room, two bed rooms are my children's room and the other is mine.
Also, the apartment faces the south so it is very bright and sunny during the day
and warm in the afternoon.
I spend most of my time in my computer room to study and relax.
It is very cozy and comfortable. so, I think my house is a good place to live.
In the past, I lived in a small apartment, but on the other hand, I live in a large apartment now.
Compared to my old house, my current house is brighter and more specious.
My old house had small three bedrooms with one bath room
but now, my current house with two bath rooms and big tree rooms.
Overall, my current house is better.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Julia!
Thank you for writing a script about your place. Please take note of the corrected sentences and practice them for our class on Friday.
Have a good afternoon!
Aki~
I live in an apartment with my family in Hwaseong city.
>>> CORRECT!
OR >>> I live with my family in an apartment in Hwaseong City.
There is a living room with a sofa.
>>> CORRECT!
There are three bed room, two bed rooms are my children's room and the other is mine.
>>> There are three bedrooms;  two bedrooms are for my children and the other is ours.
Also, the apartment faces the south so it is very bright and sunny during the day and warm in the afternoon.
>>> CORRECT!
I spend most of my time in my computer room to study and relax.
>>> I spend most of my time in my computer room studying and relaxing.
It is very cozy and comfortable. so, I think my house is a good place to live in.
>>> CORRECT!
In the past, I lived in a small apartment, but on the other hand, I live in a large apartment now.
>>> CORRECT!
OR>>> I used to live in a small apartment.
Compared to my old house, my current house is brighter and more spacious.
>>> CORRECT!
My old house had small three bedrooms with one bathroom.
>>> CORRECT!
but now, my current house with two bathrooms and big tree rooms.
>>> But now, my current house has two bathrooms and big three rooms.
Overall, my current house is better.
>>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121941 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-28 1
121940 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-28 1400
121939 War Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-27 2
121938 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-27 685
121937 Please describe the area around your neighborhood ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-27 1484
121936 How important is English for you in your job or future? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-27 1
121935 Abortion Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-27 2
121934 Bothering ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-27 1
121933 Who takes after your daughter? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-27 1142
121932 homework ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-27 1341
121931 Video Games Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-27 2
121930 8/26 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 2990
121929 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 710
121928 HW : What was the best book you have ever read? ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 768
121927 Whose opinion matters to you the most? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 682
121926 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 1174
121925 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 4
121924 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 0
121923 Do you think that knowing a foreign language might encourage you... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 646
121922 Caleb\'s homework for 26 Aug 2022. ±Ç*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 1062

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04