¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What was the last piece of good news you heard?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ä*¼®
2022-07-26 499

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It was about the news from European Union which they will ban internal combustion engine cars from 2035. It means that you are able to buy only electric car. But in fact, you can not forcast whether it is possble to change from combustion engine to elctric car, because there are a huge kinds of challenges and obstacles. Especially, rare material and energy industry structure are the most un solvable problem. That is, humanbeings avarice stop the progress.

As you know electric car is not a best choice for environmental protection. Electric car also generates CO2 as well. When you produce electricity, you use a huge amount of fossil fuel and the process you build cars. Except that, during the distribution process you generates CO2 and other emission too.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Charley!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


It was about the news from European Union which they will ban internal combustion engine cars from 2035. 

>> The news was about European Union's plan to ban internal combustion engine cars from 2035. 

It means that you are able to buy only electric car. 

>> It means that you are able to buy only electric cars. 

But in fact, you can not forcast whether it is possble to change from combustion engine to elctric car, because there are a huge kinds of challenges and obstacles.

>> But the matter of fact is you can not forecast whether it is possible to change from combustion engines to electric cars, because there are huge kinds of challenges and obstacles.

Especially, rare material and energy industry structure are the most un solvable problem. 

>> Especially because rare materials and energy industry structures are the most unsolvable problem. 

That is, humanbeings avarice stop the progress.
>> Human beings advance stops the progress.


As you know electric car is not a best choice for environmental protection. 

>> As you know, an electric car is not the best choice for environmental protection. 

Electric car also generates CO2 as well. 

>> An electric car also generates CO2.


When you produce electricity, you use a huge amount of fossil fuel and the process you build cars. 

>> When you produce electricity, you use a huge amount of fossil fuel in the process of building cars. 

Except that, during the distribution process you generates CO2 and other emission too.

>> Other than that, during the distribution process, you generate CO2 and other emissions too.



---------------->>>>KINDLY LIMIT YOUR ANSWER TO 5 SENTENCES ONLY. THANK YOU!<<<<----------------------

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124164 Transportation to prefer when I travel ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-14 1469
124163 How can South Korea achieve its long-sought goal of a free and... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-14 1024
124162 What kind f books do you read? Why do you like it? ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-12-14 1383
124161 How does a change in temperature affect your feelings? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-14 1087
124160 ¿µ Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-14 974
124159 Where would you like to spend your winter vacation? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-14 0
124158 Have you experienced bad service lately? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-14 0
124157 How do you feel about your parents growing older? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-14 893
124156 homework 1 ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2022-12-14 1
124155 Homework(12/13) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1
124154 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 2
124153 HOMEWORK: What time of year is the best weather where you live?... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1
124152 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 785
124151 Are you good at keeping secrets? Answer in a few sentences. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1202
124150 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 7
124149 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1543
124148 Would you put a lot of pressure on your kids to study hard? Why... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1041
124147 I don¡¯t takte vitamins. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 849
124146 The best part of the Seoul ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1547
124145 Writing a sentence ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04