¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What was the last piece of good news you heard?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ä*¼®
2022-07-26 536

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It was about the news from European Union which they will ban internal combustion engine cars from 2035. It means that you are able to buy only electric car. But in fact, you can not forcast whether it is possble to change from combustion engine to elctric car, because there are a huge kinds of challenges and obstacles. Especially, rare material and energy industry structure are the most un solvable problem. That is, humanbeings avarice stop the progress.

As you know electric car is not a best choice for environmental protection. Electric car also generates CO2 as well. When you produce electricity, you use a huge amount of fossil fuel and the process you build cars. Except that, during the distribution process you generates CO2 and other emission too.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Charley!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


It was about the news from European Union which they will ban internal combustion engine cars from 2035. 

>> The news was about European Union's plan to ban internal combustion engine cars from 2035. 

It means that you are able to buy only electric car. 

>> It means that you are able to buy only electric cars. 

But in fact, you can not forcast whether it is possble to change from combustion engine to elctric car, because there are a huge kinds of challenges and obstacles.

>> But the matter of fact is you can not forecast whether it is possible to change from combustion engines to electric cars, because there are huge kinds of challenges and obstacles.

Especially, rare material and energy industry structure are the most un solvable problem. 

>> Especially because rare materials and energy industry structures are the most unsolvable problem. 

That is, humanbeings avarice stop the progress.
>> Human beings advance stops the progress.


As you know electric car is not a best choice for environmental protection. 

>> As you know, an electric car is not the best choice for environmental protection. 

Electric car also generates CO2 as well. 

>> An electric car also generates CO2.


When you produce electricity, you use a huge amount of fossil fuel and the process you build cars. 

>> When you produce electricity, you use a huge amount of fossil fuel in the process of building cars. 

Except that, during the distribution process you generates CO2 and other emission too.

>> Other than that, during the distribution process, you generate CO2 and other emissions too.



---------------->>>>KINDLY LIMIT YOUR ANSWER TO 5 SENTENCES ONLY. THANK YOU!<<<<----------------------

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118376 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 1
118375 What makes me happy. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 144
118374 Why I would not to be a pilot ±è*¼º ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-21 189
118373 What song would you like to dedicate to your parents and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 179
118372 Writing Task(Apr 19th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 107
118371 krowemoh 02/4 ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 84
118370 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 2
118369 I will read book the 1st. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 119
118368 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 3
118367 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 0
118366 Answer in complete sentences ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 107
118365 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 1
118364 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 106
118363 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 2
118362 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 78
118361 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 84
118360 If you could have one superpower, what would it be? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 103
118359 What city do you think is the best in South Korea? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 82
118358 Does beauty affect one\'s success in life? Why do you think so? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 4
118357 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-20 65

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04