¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think school trips are popular?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*º°
2022-07-26 745

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I think school trips are popular. Whenever teachers announce my classmates school trips, my classmates always answered positively. Also, my classmates talked about what they would pack with happy face. I think that it means that they are so happy to go on a school trip. However, sometimes, my classmates don't like to go on school trips, because of place to travel. They don't like to go educative places like a museum. So, my school agonizes to select best places.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey there, Kimberly!


Well done in writing your paragraph! It is great that you used deep vocabulary and expressions such as "agonizes" and "happy face". They add more elements to your writing.

I totally agree that school trips are popular with the students because of the chance to see new places. I hope you get to visit more exciting places on your next school trip!


See you in class^^


~ Teacher Gela


Yes, I think school trips are popular.

>> CORRECT


Whenever teachers announce my classmates school trips, my classmates always answered positively.

>> Whenever teachers announce about school trips, my classmates always answer positively.


Also, my classmates talked about what they would pack with happy face.

>> Also, my classmates talked about what they would pack with happy faces.


I think that it means that they are so happy to go on a school trip.

>>CORRECT

OR >> I think, it means that they are excited to go on a school trip.


However, sometimes, my classmates don't like to go on school trips, because of place to travel.

>> However, sometimes, my classmates don't like to go on school trips because of the places to visit.


They don't like to go educative places like a museum.

>> They don't like to go to educational places like a museum.


So, my school agonizes to select best places.

>> So my school agonizes in selecting the best places.

OR >>  So my school finds it difficult to choose the best places.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123400 made japchae ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2022-11-04 2070
123399 I think that people who do business should be able to use the... ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-04 2359
123398 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-04 1
123397 subsidy ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-04 1708
123396 Describe a rule that you don¡¯t like ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-11-04 2
123395 11.03.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-04 1
123394 What hobbies do you think would be boring? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-04 2
123393 What advice can you give to someone who wants to learn how to... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-11-04 246
123392 The reason why English fluency is significant for me ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-11-04 1407
123391 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 1580
123390 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 2116
123389 11/3 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 1113
123388 What is the most beautiful artwork you have ever seen before?... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 1597
123387 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 4
123386 Some people say breakfast is the most important meal of the day.... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 2197
123385 Have you experienced having fake friends with bad intentions?... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 1837
123384 What is the downside of living in an urban or busy hometown? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 1664
123383 Having many siblings are better ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 0
123382 Do gestures help you to understand others and express yourself,... ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 1980
123381 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-03 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04