¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think school trips are popular?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*º°
2022-07-26 804

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I think school trips are popular. Whenever teachers announce my classmates school trips, my classmates always answered positively. Also, my classmates talked about what they would pack with happy face. I think that it means that they are so happy to go on a school trip. However, sometimes, my classmates don't like to go on school trips, because of place to travel. They don't like to go educative places like a museum. So, my school agonizes to select best places.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey there, Kimberly!


Well done in writing your paragraph! It is great that you used deep vocabulary and expressions such as "agonizes" and "happy face". They add more elements to your writing.

I totally agree that school trips are popular with the students because of the chance to see new places. I hope you get to visit more exciting places on your next school trip!


See you in class^^


~ Teacher Gela


Yes, I think school trips are popular.

>> CORRECT


Whenever teachers announce my classmates school trips, my classmates always answered positively.

>> Whenever teachers announce about school trips, my classmates always answer positively.


Also, my classmates talked about what they would pack with happy face.

>> Also, my classmates talked about what they would pack with happy faces.


I think that it means that they are so happy to go on a school trip.

>>CORRECT

OR >> I think, it means that they are excited to go on a school trip.


However, sometimes, my classmates don't like to go on school trips, because of place to travel.

>> However, sometimes, my classmates don't like to go on school trips because of the places to visit.


They don't like to go educative places like a museum.

>> They don't like to go to educational places like a museum.


So, my school agonizes to select best places.

>> So my school agonizes in selecting the best places.

OR >>  So my school finds it difficult to choose the best places.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124138 What kind of lie do you think people commonly say? ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1177
124137 Homework 12/13 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 4
124136 What type of transportation do you prefer? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 0
124135 Do you think there is a connection between beauty and... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1
124134 What are the major tourist attractions in your city? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 0
124133 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1318
124132 Do you think you are easily persuaded to buy things after seeing... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1
124131 How do you deal with people who cannot meet their deadlines? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 2
124130 12/12 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1158
124129 why mbti test becomes popular ¾È*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 2245
124128 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 0
124127 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 0
124126 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1098
124125 HOMEWORK: Is increasing your vocabulary important? What... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 0
124124 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 2
124123 hoemwork ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 969
124122 The World Cup Final is always among the most watched television... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1450
124121 Do you like Christmas decorations? How do you feel about the... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 977
124120 If I can change¡¦ ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1098
124119 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1689

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04