¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think school trips are popular?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*º°
2022-07-26 854

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, I think school trips are popular. Whenever teachers announce my classmates school trips, my classmates always answered positively. Also, my classmates talked about what they would pack with happy face. I think that it means that they are so happy to go on a school trip. However, sometimes, my classmates don't like to go on school trips, because of place to travel. They don't like to go educative places like a museum. So, my school agonizes to select best places.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hey there, Kimberly!


Well done in writing your paragraph! It is great that you used deep vocabulary and expressions such as "agonizes" and "happy face". They add more elements to your writing.

I totally agree that school trips are popular with the students because of the chance to see new places. I hope you get to visit more exciting places on your next school trip!


See you in class^^


~ Teacher Gela


Yes, I think school trips are popular.

>> CORRECT


Whenever teachers announce my classmates school trips, my classmates always answered positively.

>> Whenever teachers announce about school trips, my classmates always answer positively.


Also, my classmates talked about what they would pack with happy face.

>> Also, my classmates talked about what they would pack with happy faces.


I think that it means that they are so happy to go on a school trip.

>>CORRECT

OR >> I think, it means that they are excited to go on a school trip.


However, sometimes, my classmates don't like to go on school trips, because of place to travel.

>> However, sometimes, my classmates don't like to go on school trips because of the places to visit.


They don't like to go educative places like a museum.

>> They don't like to go to educational places like a museum.


So, my school agonizes to select best places.

>> So my school agonizes in selecting the best places.

OR >>  So my school finds it difficult to choose the best places.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118454 2022.4.22 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-04-23 92
118453 4/22 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 117
118452 What is the best part of weekend vacation? What\'s the worst? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 162
118451 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 3
118450 How is the Internet affecting our intelligence? Describe your... ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 108
118449 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 97
118448 part 2 ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 103
118447 Why do we need weekends? What are your plans for this weekend? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 145
118446 What restaurant in your country do you recommend a foreigner to... ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 110
118445 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 103
118444 What do you think about the government\'s plan to allow people... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 2
118443 What benefits do you think the compulsory military will give to... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 115
118442 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 100
118441 What video game do you think is best and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 151
118440 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 137
118439 Money that should be used in the short term was saved in the... ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 142
118438 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 0
118437 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 106
118436 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 0
118435 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-22 93

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04