¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How important are you to your family?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àü*ä
2022-07-26 311

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Family is most important thing to me. I think I'm very lucky person. it is because I have perfect my whole family.
They always will be my side. That give me a confidence to live the life. I feel security. And also I like my parents hometown.
It's not Seoul. There is countryside nearby the sea.
They have lived in hometown since they were kid.
And they give us special hometown and even vacation house.
After I became a adult, I think about my future family seriously.
I decide, I will make a family like my parents.
I think my goal in my life is perfect happiness.
Family can make my goal.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Eun Chae!
Thanks for sharing about your family.  You have good simple sentences, but check the corrections and be familiar with the use of articles and the right words for your sentences. ^^


~T. Maine 


Family is most important thing to me. 
>>My family is the most important people to me. 
I think I'm very lucky person. it is because I have perfect my whole family.
>>I think I'm a very lucky person because I have a completely perfect family. 
They always will be my side. 
>>They always will be at my side. 
That give me a confidence to live the life. 
>> That gives me the confidence to live my life. 
I feel security. And also I like my parents hometown.
>> I feel secure and I also like my parents' hometown.
It's not Seoul. 
>> Correct. 
There is countryside nearby the sea.
>> That is the countryside nearby the sea. 
They have lived in hometown since they were kid.
>> They have lived in their hometown since they were kids.
And they give us special hometown and even vacation house.
>>And they give us a special hometown and even a vacation house. 
After I became a adult, I think about my future family seriously.
>>After I became an adult, I think about my future family seriously. 
I decide, I will make a family like my parents.
>> I decide to make a family and be like my parents. 
I think my goal in my life is perfect happiness.
>>Correct. 
Family can make my goal.
>>Correct. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122967 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-13 2254
122966 What is your favorite room in your house? Why? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-13 1
122965 homework ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-13 3
122964 Claire\'s Homework ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 2053
122963 10/12 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 2198
122962 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 2116
122961 emotion ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 1733
122960 Goal is for doing something their best ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 0
122959 What¡¯s are the differences between movies and plays? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 2062
122958 Do you easily recover from an illness? How do cope with it? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 2299
122957 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 1574
122956 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 2089
122955 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 0
122954 Can you control your emotions well? How? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 5758
122953 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 0
122952 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 2
122951 homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 0
122950 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 1
122949 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 0
122948 I am a sensitive person. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-10-12 2510

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04