¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do you think can racism be stopped?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-07-26 320

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Ohhhhh... it's a tough question. I think we should only need to respect each other, but it's not a reality. And it's a serious problem, especially in the United States. After pandemic, the problem seems to have become more hateful towards Asians. And in my personal opinion, the government needs to step up and impose sanctions and strengthen the punishment.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Elic:) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Ohhhhh... it's a tough question. 
>> Oh! That's a tough question. 

I think we should only need to respect each other, but it's not a reality. 
>> I think we should respect each other always but not everyone is like that. 

And it's a serious problem, especially in the United States. 
>> CORRECT

After pandemic, the problem seems to have become more hateful towards Asians. 
>> After the pandemic, the problem seems to have become more hateful towards Asians. 

And in my personal opinion, the government needs to step up and impose sanctions and strengthen the punishment. 
>>  CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122909 apple À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-10-11 1089
122908 10/11 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-11 1570
122907 How much sports do you do at school? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-11 0
122906 english speech contest script ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-11 2
122905 Is giving free fruits and vegetables common in Korea? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 0
122904 Social media ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 2
122903 travel ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 2259
122902 10.10.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 1
122901 Are you scared of going/ seeing your doctor? Why or why not? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 3246
122900 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 2479
122899 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 2051
122898 Free essay À±*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 3
122897 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 2138
122896 What\'s the most interesting trip you\'ve ever been on? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 2363
122895 What is your busiest day of the week? Why? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 1801
122894 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 0
122893 The best way to make kids eat more vegetables ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 1
122892 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 1886
122891 About Korean hero ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 1
122890 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-10 2370

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04