¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Hi Gemmar

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Áø
2022-07-19 522

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

The message are very proper to children who has many years to live.
It will encourage children to do their best in learning for their futures.
But If the elderly are told that masseage, I don't think that they assent the massege.
Children will learn naturally that they cannot achieve anything even they try hard.
As you know, there are so much things in this world which we cannot achieve even though we try to the death.
We often face to the limits and we are dissapointed with the results we tried to get.
In korea we have a saying.
" You are painful and hurted because you are the young"

Are you painful? you must young one. hihihihi

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Ms. Eunice! ^^Thanks for your opinion. Actually in my country, parents usually tell their children to study hard because they cannot inherit anything from their parents but good education. Sometimes, when children are already grown ups, it's like "it's pay back time!" hahaha! Like they have to work and support their parents, by this time, it's the other way around. Parents would stop working and grown-up children would be the one to work for their family. Does it sound fairness? Hehehe
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The message are very proper to children who has many years to live.
>>> The message is very true to children who have many years to live.
It will encourage children to do their best in learning for their future.
>>> CORRECT
But If the elderly are told that masseage, I don't think that they assent the massege.
>>> But if the elderly are told that message, I don't think that they will assent to the message.
Children will learn naturally that they cannot achieve anything even they try hard.
>>> CORRECT
As you know, there are so much things in this world which we cannot achieve even though we try until death.
>>> CORRECT
We often face to the limits and we are dissapointed with the results we tried to get.
>>> We often face the limits and we are disappointed with the results we tried to get.
In korea we have a saying.
>>> In Korea, we have a saying that goes:
" You are painful and hurted because you are the young"
>>> 
" You are in pain and hurt because you are young"
Are you painful? you must young one. hihihihi
>>> Are you in pain? You must be the younger one. hihihihi
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120834 Is it more fun to exercise alone or with other people? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 1158
120833 Was it hard to live in Australia during your first year? ÀÓ*¶û ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 2
120832 even ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 715
120831 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 3
120830 What would life be like without weekends? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 2
120829 The Internet Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 1
120828 Health ³ë*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 601
120827 Do you like visiting the library? / Where is your favorite place... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 1
120826 Which city has the most delicious food in your country? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 669
120825 Does social media improve people¡¯s communication skills? Why or... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 0
120824 What have you learned from past failures? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-07-18 1377
120823 Tell me what you do in your part-time job. ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 1257
120822 What is the best present you have ever received? ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 1027
120821 07.15.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 1
120820 What do you think is the most dangerous animal? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 711
120819 What facts my school have. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 760
120818 Why I don\'t want to try raising animals. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 839
120817 What I like of my favorite subject ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 818
120816 Did you interview people before? How was the experience? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 3
120815 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-17 885

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04