¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Thursday Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2022-07-14 804

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:What are the advantages of eating fast food?
A:One of the advantages of eating fast food is I can feel better.
Many people says that fast foods are not that good at health but eating them sometimes are not that bad.
And most of fast foods are delicious so I can feel better.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


One of the advantages of eating fast food is I can feel better.

>> One of the advantages of eating fast food is that I can feel better.
Many people says that fast foods are not that good at health but eating them sometimes are not that bad.

>> Many people say that fast foods are not that good for the health, but eating them sometimes are not that bad.
And most of fast foods are delicious so I can feel better.

>> Most fast foods are delicious so I can feel better when I eat them.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120398 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 424
120397 MEDICAL school ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 203
120396 live alone Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 2
120395 3.homework Á¶*¸§ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 434
120394 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 2
120393 Does your personality change when you¡¯re gaming? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 394
120392 What are the things that you would/would never do for a friend? ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 2
120391 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 2
120390 What do you spend most with your money? / Where is your favorite... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 1
120389 Why do rich people become richer and poor people become poorer? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 1
120388 What are the things you need when you go on a trip? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-07-03 490
120387 What do you like to watch on TV? ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-03 420
120386 Did you feel more handsome when you wore make-up? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-03 3
120385 What is your favorite Korean tradition? Share your answer in a... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-03 698
120384 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-03 2
120383 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-03 1
120382 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-03 1
120381 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-03 549
120380 What is one mistake you\'ve done that you don\'t want to happen... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-02 442
120379 What presents when I give in parents day to parents. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-07-02 531

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04