¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Thursday Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2022-07-14 789

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:What are the advantages of eating fast food?
A:One of the advantages of eating fast food is I can feel better.
Many people says that fast foods are not that good at health but eating them sometimes are not that bad.
And most of fast foods are delicious so I can feel better.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


One of the advantages of eating fast food is I can feel better.

>> One of the advantages of eating fast food is that I can feel better.
Many people says that fast foods are not that good at health but eating them sometimes are not that bad.

>> Many people say that fast foods are not that good for the health, but eating them sometimes are not that bad.
And most of fast foods are delicious so I can feel better.

>> Most fast foods are delicious so I can feel better when I eat them.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121061 Playing ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 1
121060 homework Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 595
121059 What concerns do you have about food? What are your ¡®rules of... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 2260
121058 Would you recommend that a friend take a cruise? Why or why not? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 324
121057 What is your favorite music? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 5
121056 How important are you to your family? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 224
121055 How do you think can racism be stopped? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 212
121054 School uniform does not stop bullying and may increase violent... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 208
121053 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 185
121052 7/25 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 187
121051 When is a white lie acceptable? Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 179
121050 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 1
121049 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 511
121048 Give a short summary of the paragraph about JOB PROMOTION. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 196
121047 What kind of job do you want to get in the future? What kind of... ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 238
121046 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 1
121045 What things about summer do you like most and least? What do you... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 217
121044 07.25.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 1
121043 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 0
121042 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-25 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04