¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

gadgets

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼­*ȯ
2022-07-13 602

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

umm let me think about it...i am prefer comfortable one than new one. its because you know, science technology is changed very fast now days. so.. honestly i cant trace the science technology advance. i know sometimes new gadgets is more comfortable than old one. but it is usually makes me hard to adapt and makes me headache

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Robin!
It is really important to check your grammar in English.  Reading more English articles could be helpful as you read, understand, and be familiar with the patterns.  Try also to make your sentences with the right pattern.  ^^

~T. Maine

umm let me think about it...i am prefer comfortable one than new one. 
>>I prefer a comfortable one to the new one. 
its because you know, science technology is changed very fast now days. 
>>It's because you know, science and technology are changing very fast these days. 
so.. honestly i cant trace the science technology advance. 
>>So honestly, I can't trace science and technology's advancement. 
i know sometimes new gadgets is more comfortable than old one. 
>> I know sometimes new gadgets are more comfortable than the old ones. 
but it is usually makes me hard to adapt and makes me headache
>>But it usually makes me hard to adapt and makes me have a headache. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123192 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-25 2009
123191 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-25 1732
123190 Long trips or short ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-25 1
123189 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-25 2
123188 Homework~~ ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-25 1889
123187 24. Oct. 2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-25 1
123186 What was the last book you read about? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-25 0
123185 What would you like to add in your fitness journey? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-25 1
123184 emotional intelligent ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 1769
123183 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 2810
123182 What kinds of jobs interest you most and least? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 1755
123181 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 1904
123180 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 2086
123179 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 2
123178 When do you need your family most? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 2609
123177 What kind of games do you like? ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 5
123176 What is emotional intelligence? How emotionally intelligent are... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 2455
123175 H0mework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 3154
123174 Choose a novel and write something about it. ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 2686
123173 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-24 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04