¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your opinion about people with tattoos? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-07-13 591

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, we can feel free about doing tattoos.
Because we don't say that you can't decorate yourself.
It is same too.
Doing tattoos is one of decorations that people do.
Because of this reason, I think we can feel free about doing tattoos nowadays.
But actually, I don't like tattoos.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In my opinion, we can feel free about doing tattoos.
>> In my opinion, we should have the freedom to have tattoos. 

Because we don't say that you can't decorate yourself.
>> It is because no one usually say that we can decorate or accessorize ourselves.

It is same too.
>> It is the same as well. 

Doing tattoos is one of decorations that people do.
>> Having tattoos is an example on how people decorate themselves. 

Because of this reason, I think we can feel free about doing tattoos nowadays.
>> Because of this reason, I think we should feel free to decorate ourselves with tattoos. 

But actually, I don't like tattoos.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121900 Where do you want to travel to before you die? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-08-26 768
121899 Which is more pleasant, forgiving or taking revenge? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 2234
121898 Tell me something about yourself ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1332
121897 8/25 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 715
121896 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 804
121895 The happiest time in my life. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 829
121894 Music ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 804
121893 What\'s the most miserable you\'ve been? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 909
121892 Do most people in your country prefer traditional medicine,... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 904
121891 Hi ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 5
121890 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 926
121889 Who is the kindest person you know? What are some of his/her... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1009
121888 My thoughts on music. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1237
121887 8/25 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 848
121886 08.25.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 2
121885 What kind of lifestyle do you want to have? Share your thoughts... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1495
121884 How important is time in your culture? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1039
121883 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 2
121882 What is the best memory you have of your family doing something... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 901
121881 8/25 homework ¾È*Çå ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1019

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04