¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Hi Gemmar

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Áø
2022-07-13 252

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Many people like to eat unhealthy food even though they know it\'s bad for them. Why? What are the most effective ways to improve people\'s eating habits?

Unhealthy food is usually good taste to seduce people.
When you start to eat the unhealthy and yummy food, you cannot stop eating it.
It's like a strong addiction.
The way that you stop eating unhealthy food, you might have not eaten the unhealthy food from the begginning.
To have good eating habits,
First of all, fill the refrigerator with divese vegetables and healthy foods.
And go to home right away after work, and cook healthy dishes.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day Ms. Eunice! I agree! Unhealthy is yummy! hahaha But we have to take in moderation. Too much is bad. Hahaha!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Unhealthy food is usually good taste to seduce people.
>>> Unhealthy food usually have a good taste and could seduce people.
When you start to eat the unhealthy and yummy food, you cannot stop eating it.
>>> When you start to eat unhealthy and yummy food, you cannot stop eating it.
It's like a strong addiction.
>>> CORRECT
The way that you stop eating unhealthy food, you might have not eaten the unhealthy food from the beginning.
>>> The only way to stop eating unhealthy food, is not eating it in the first place. 
To have good eating habits,

First of all, fill the refrigerator with divese vegetables and healthy foods.
>>> To have good eating habits, first of all, fill the refrigerator with diverse vegetables and healthy foods.
And go to home right away after work, and cook healthy dishes.
>>> Then, go home straight after work, and cook healthy dishes.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120899 Do you think being slim equals beautiful? Why or why not? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 504
120898 Choosing subjects Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 1
120897 What¡¯s the best way to get things done on time? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 1
120896 Homework for 07.19.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 1
120895 Describe a time of the day you like ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 1
120894 What influences other people in their dreams or ambition? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 398
120893 Many people today put personal information online for the needs... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 0
120892 The best way to make the road transport of goods safer is to ask... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 0
120891 What¡¯s the best way to travel? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 358
120890 7/19 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 388
120889 What activity do you like to do on a nice weather? ±è*°â ÁøÇàÁß 2022-07-19 524
120888 ? ±è*¿± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 311
120887 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 1
120886 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 256
120885 Why do you think the US has so much interest in the \'Chip 4\'... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 327
120884 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 2
120883 If I were to give someone advice on how to study English well. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 247
120882 What can we do to protect ourselves against cancer? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 454
120881 Why are some people not interested in sport? ÃÖ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 717
120880 Do you think that religion is important? Why or why not? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-19 329

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04