¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your opinion about people with tattoos? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-07-12 422

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

These days, tattoos are popular especially young people and women.
What We do tattoos at our not only bodies but also our eyelines and eyebrows becomes common.
Except those tigers and some letters, I think tattoos is good for our appearance.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Gina! :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

These days, tattoos are popular especially young people and women.
>> These days, tattoos are popular, especially to young people and women.

What We do tattoos at our not only bodies but also our eyelines and eyebrows becomes common.
>> We can do other tattoos nowadays already, like tattoo eyeliners and tattooed eyebrows. 

Except those tigers and some letters, I think tattoos is good for our appearance.
>>  I think tattoos are good for our appearance.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117507 Do you want to change something in your appearance? Why or why... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 0
117506 Friday homeowrk ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 858
117505 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 713
117504 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 2
117503 Animal cruelty is a crime. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 626
117502 My Weakness ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 542
117501 Where is the best place in your country to see or experience... ¼º*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 539
117500 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1
117499 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1
117498 My weakness ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 577
117497 What makes you happy? ÇÑ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 409
117496 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 775
117495 I would appreciate it if you could check the sentence below. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 794
117494 Do you want to change something in your appearance? Why or why... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 572
117493 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 872
117492 2022.3.16 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 630
117491 202.3.15 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 550
117490 Is there anything you dislike about weekends? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1
117489 Aside from yourself, do you also worry about the health of those... ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1115
117488 How do you usually cope with your stress? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1061

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04