¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your opinion about people with tattoos? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-07-12 313

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

These days, tattoos are popular especially young people and women.
What We do tattoos at our not only bodies but also our eyelines and eyebrows becomes common.
Except those tigers and some letters, I think tattoos is good for our appearance.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Gina! :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

These days, tattoos are popular especially young people and women.
>> These days, tattoos are popular, especially to young people and women.

What We do tattoos at our not only bodies but also our eyelines and eyebrows becomes common.
>> We can do other tattoos nowadays already, like tattoo eyeliners and tattooed eyebrows. 

Except those tigers and some letters, I think tattoos is good for our appearance.
>>  I think tattoos are good for our appearance.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119628 Proposal ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 4
119627 What are the things we could do to protect ourselves from crime? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 79
119626 What makes me angry. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 136
119625 What is the strangest holiday or festival you have heard of? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 585
119624 What other languages do you want to learn? Why? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 1
119623 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 87
119622 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 85
119621 Do you think that you should change your eating habits? Why or... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 0
119620 In marriages today, some argue that it is the responsibility of... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 0
119619 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 2
119618 The shortage of housing in big cities can cause severe... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 0
119617 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 2
119616 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 5
119615 Betray ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 1
119614 the war ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 54
119613 Do you feel comfortable when you stay at a hotel? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 1
119612 What makes you stand out? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 109
119611 What are the pros (good things) and cons (bad things) of living... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 2
119610 How important are family gatherings in your country? ±è*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 135
119609 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-06 73

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04