¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What illness are you afraid of the most and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-07-11 728

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The illness that I am afraid of the most is AIDS.
As you know, If I get AIDS, then I just die and there isn't any treatment that can stop this illness.
Many people may know that you only infect this illness with sexual contact, but there is other ways.
If we use same toilet with a person who is having AIDS, then we could be infected.
Because of these reasons, I am afraid of AIDS the most among a lot of illnesses.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! :) 

Me too! I am afraid of the illness as well. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

The illness that I am afraid of the most is AIDS.
>> CORRECT

As you know, If I get AIDS, then I just die and there isn't any treatment that can stop this illness.
>> As you know, if a person gets AIDS, there will be no treatment and then they just die eventually. 

Many people may know that you only infect this illness with sexual contact, but there is other ways.
>> Many people may know that you can only get infected with this illness through sexual contact, but there are other ways.

If we use same toilet with a person who is having AIDS, then we could be infected.
>> If we use same toilet with a person who has AIDS, then we could be infected.

Because of these reasons, I am afraid of AIDS the most among a lot of illnesses.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119760 Do you ever try to save electricity at home. Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 166
119759 Dangerous Experience ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 86
119758 The happiest memory of my school says. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 145
119757 Soeun\'s Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 2
119756 make a lot of money or enjoy your job? À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 198
119755 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 2
119754 What do you have on your bucket list? What are the benefits of... ±è*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 190
119753 the capsized canoe ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 250
119752 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 220
119751 What is your most dangerous experience in life? ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 487
119750 What three things do you do to loosen up? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 2
119749 How often do you go shopping for food? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 106
119748 What animal best represents you? Why? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-10 1
119747 What are your top appointments nowadays? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-09 2
119746 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-09 88
119745 6/9 HOMEWORK ( •̀ ¥ø •́ )y ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-09 320
119744 I\'d rather swim in a pool ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-09 436
119743 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-09 3
119742 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-09 2
119741 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-09 233

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04