¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Hi Gemmar

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Áø
2022-07-08 839

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative effect on the environment, eating habits, and families. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

I agree with that the fast food industry had negative effects.
but I will not calim for it, because I am sure that the fast food industry have also positive effects such like belows.
1. We don't have to spend our time to cook. specially in this hot summer.
2. There are many diverse food which we can choose.
3. Fast food is proper cost compare to having a meal at a restaurant.
4. Fast food is not concerned about TOP.

With my essay, I look like a fast food person.
But I am not. ^^

Have a wonderful weekend Gemma!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Happy Friday Ms. Eunice! Friday is my most awaited day of the week! Hahaha! However, time flies so fast on weekends that before I knew it, it's already Monday. huhuhu Anyway, thank you for the helpful information and active discussion this week! Refresh and relax yourself on the weekend! I promise, I won't disturb you. hahaha See you Monday!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I agree with that the fast food industry had negative effects.
>> I agree with the claim that the fast food industry had negative effects.
but I will not calim for it, because I am sure that the fast food industry have also positive effects such like belows.
>>> But I will not claim it, because I am sure that the fast food industry also has positive effects such like as follows:
1. We don't have to spend our time to cook. specially in this hot summer.
>>> CORRECT
OR>>> 1. We don't have to spend our time to cook. specially in this hot summer season.
2. There are many diverse food which we can choose.
>>> There are diverse food which we can choose.
>>> There are many food which we can choose.
3. Fast food is proper cost compare to having a meal at a restaurant.
>>> 3. Fast food is more affordable compared to having a meal at a restaurant.
4. Fast food is not concerned about TOP.
>>> CORRECT
With my essay, I look like a fast food person.
>>> With my essay, I seem to be a person who's into fast food.
But I am not. ^^
>>> CORRECT

Have a wonderful weekend Gemma! ( YOU TOO) 


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120318 Should your country accept refugees? Why or why not? ¹é*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 706
120317 self introduction ¼Õ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 3
120316 Books Have The Power to Change The World ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 840
120315 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 3
120314 Do you think it\'s okay to drink rainwater? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 557
120313 homework À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1111
120312 homework À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1015
120311 dinner with my family ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 556
120310 What do people in your country collect? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 909
120309 How do you feel about your parents growing older? ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 861
120308 What was the biggest challenge you\'ve faced this year? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-30 1339
120307 How can teachers/professors try to prevent students from... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-29 683
120306 6/29 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-29 774
120305 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-29 584
120304 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-29 503
120303 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-29 0
120302 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-29 7
120301 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-29 0
120300 Korea is best country in the world ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-29 785
120299 What do you think is the most difficult job? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-29 823

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04