무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Do you think that money can buy happiness?

작성자: 김*겸
2022-07-07 931

회원님의 영작문

Money is important for life. I can do almost everything if I have money. However, I can't buy happiness with only money because every rich people are not happy although they have great money.

Then, don’t I need money to be happy? The answer is No. I can be more convenient and rich with much money.
But it is sure that we can get happy with little money. We can see many poor family loving each other about us.

So how can we be happy?
Above all, I think we need beloved ones to be with to be happy because happiness comes from not what I have but who I am with.

I'm not telling you that I don't need money. I also need money to live. The thing is that relationship is more important than money for us to be happy. Therefore, I hope I have enough money, good family and good friends to be happy.

*Thank you for teaching me, teacher! These days I feel that my English level is getting up and up thanks to you. I look forward to your kind and continuous support.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Rana!

Very good answer! You are right! It's not all about money. Yes, money is essential to us, since it is what we use to purchase the things that we need. But I think happiness comes from the little things that we do every day, especially with the people we love. Also, being satisfied with what we have can also make us feel happy. 

*You're welcome! Thank you as well for showing a very nice attitude in the class and I can really see that you are doing your best to learn in the class. Keep up the good work!

I'm also looking forward to have a more fun and interesting class with you. See you later ^^

~T. Roanne ^_^
=======================================================
Money is important for life. 
>> Correct! 
I can do almost everything if I have money. 
>> Correct! 
However, I can't buy happiness with only money because every rich people are not happy although they have great money.
>> However, I can't buy happiness with only money, because every rich people are not happy although they have great money.

Then, don’t I need money to be happy? The answer is No. 
>> Correct! 
I can be more convenient and rich with much money.
>> I can be more convenient and be rich with much money.
But it is sure that we can get happy with little money. 
>> But it is sure that we can get happy with less money. 
We can see many poor family loving each other about us.
>> We can see many poor family loving each other.

So how can we be happy?
>> Correct! 
Above all, I think we need beloved ones to be with to be happy because happiness comes from not what I have but who I am with.
>> Above all, I think we need to be with our beloved ones to be happy because happiness comes from not what I have but who I am with.

I'm not telling you that I don't need money. 
>> Correct! 
I also need money to live. 
>> Correct! 
The thing is that relationship is more important than money for us to be happy. 
>> The thing is that the relationship is more important than money for us to be happy. 
Therefore, I hope I have enough money, good family and good friends to be happy.
>> Correct! 





번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
120461 HOMEWORK 박*민 완료 2022-07-05 2
120460 What new hobbies would you like to try? 김*겸 완료 2022-07-05 233
120459 Homework 권*미 완료 2022-07-05 2
120458 If a woman wants an abortion, what rights does the father have? 문*현 완료 2022-07-05 655
120457 homework 김*연 완료 2022-07-05 414
120456 Homework for 07.05.2022 김*정 완료 2022-07-05 3
120455 Homework 이*경 완료 2022-07-05 2616
120454 Are older people actually wiser? 김*빈 완료 2022-07-05 495
120453 My favorite day 이*영 완료 2022-07-05 1044
120452 My biggest challenge this year 이*영 완료 2022-07-05 2223
120451 culture that i want to bring back to South Korea 이*영 완료 2022-07-05 598
120450 What is a food that people think is healthy but really isn’t?... 태*서 완료 2022-07-05 172
120449 mistake that I don\'t want to make again 이*영 완료 2022-07-05 342
120448 If you can change something about yourself, what would it be and... 김*경 완료 2022-07-05 305
120447 What culture in South Korea would you want to bring back? 류*주 완료 2022-07-05 302
120446 In your opinion, is abortion safe? Why or why not? 김*진 완료 2022-07-05 1
120445 Tuesday Homework 류*우 완료 2022-07-05 279
120444 Homework 함*주 완료 2022-07-05 1
120443 If your company asked you to work on a holiday like Cuuseok or... 이*연 완료 2022-07-05 1
120442 Do you celebrate the things you do have? 김*진 완료 2022-07-05 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]