¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task(Jul 4th, 2022)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-07-06 620

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do you think that money can buy happiness?
Yes. I think that money can buy happiness. the meaning of that,as far as I define it as, is that I can be happy with money.
No. Actually, everyone knows "MONEY CAN BUY HAPPINESS" And the more I have, the happier I would be. Some people say "Money can not make us happy itself. There's something more important than money". However, the chances are the people who say this must be the ones who don't have enough and don't even try to earn more money, sacrificing their instant gratifications and paying the price.
And this is what I heard on a YouTube clip on the way home today, in the evening. We know dozens of people who are kind to everyone and help others with their full heart. But it is obvious that most of them are poor or live under the average life, in the aspects of how much money they have.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, U Seung! 

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this one. Have a good rest!

~T. Roanne ^_^
===================================================
Yes. I think that money can buy happiness. 
>> Correct! 
the meaning of that,as far as I define it as, is that I can be happy with money.
>> The meaning of that, as far as I define it as, is that I can be happy with money.
No. Actually, everyone knows "MONEY CAN BUY HAPPINESS" And the more I have, the happier I would be. 
>> No. Actually, everyone knows "MONEY CAN BUY HAPPINESS" And the more I have, the happier I would be. 
Some people say "Money can not make us happy itself. 
>> Correct! 
There's something more important than money". 
>> Correct! 
However, the chances are the people who say this must be the ones who don't have enough and don't even try to earn more money, sacrificing their instant gratifications and paying the price.
>> Correct! 
And this is what I heard on a YouTube clip on the way home today, in the evening. 
>> Correct! 
We know dozens of people who are kind to everyone and help others with their full heart. 
>> Correct! 
But it is obvious that most of them are poor or live under the average life, in the aspects of how much money they have.
>> Correct! 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118284 worst memory ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 98
118283 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 1
118282 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 138
118281 How do you usually cheer up those people close to you? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 134
118280 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 2
118279 Are fat people lazy? Tell me your thought. ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 1
118278 homework ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 12
118277 Somking ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 1
118276 Work ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 16
118275 Leave ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 12
118274 N ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 19
118273 What stressful situation did you have in your new company? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 4
118272 Writing Task(Apr 13th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-16 117
118271 What do you think of people who complain a lot? ½Å*¼· ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 170
118270 Is setting a deadline important? why do you say so? ½Å*¼· ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 137
118269 I don\\\'t want to be in a rush. ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 259
118268 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 1
118267 According to the article, with the opening of the Seoul Arena,... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 151
118266 What is the best memory you have of your family doing something... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 128
118265 4/14 HOMEWORK ( •̀ ¥ø •́ )y ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 128

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04