¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task(Jul 4th, 2022)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-07-06 555

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do you think that money can buy happiness?
Yes. I think that money can buy happiness. the meaning of that,as far as I define it as, is that I can be happy with money.
No. Actually, everyone knows "MONEY CAN BUY HAPPINESS" And the more I have, the happier I would be. Some people say "Money can not make us happy itself. There's something more important than money". However, the chances are the people who say this must be the ones who don't have enough and don't even try to earn more money, sacrificing their instant gratifications and paying the price.
And this is what I heard on a YouTube clip on the way home today, in the evening. We know dozens of people who are kind to everyone and help others with their full heart. But it is obvious that most of them are poor or live under the average life, in the aspects of how much money they have.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, U Seung! 

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this one. Have a good rest!

~T. Roanne ^_^
===================================================
Yes. I think that money can buy happiness. 
>> Correct! 
the meaning of that,as far as I define it as, is that I can be happy with money.
>> The meaning of that, as far as I define it as, is that I can be happy with money.
No. Actually, everyone knows "MONEY CAN BUY HAPPINESS" And the more I have, the happier I would be. 
>> No. Actually, everyone knows "MONEY CAN BUY HAPPINESS" And the more I have, the happier I would be. 
Some people say "Money can not make us happy itself. 
>> Correct! 
There's something more important than money". 
>> Correct! 
However, the chances are the people who say this must be the ones who don't have enough and don't even try to earn more money, sacrificing their instant gratifications and paying the price.
>> Correct! 
And this is what I heard on a YouTube clip on the way home today, in the evening. 
>> Correct! 
We know dozens of people who are kind to everyone and help others with their full heart. 
>> Correct! 
But it is obvious that most of them are poor or live under the average life, in the aspects of how much money they have.
>> Correct! 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118918 Do you have a friend that you haven\'t seen for a long time?... ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 186
118917 What is the strangest food you have ever tried? Tell me about it. ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 124
118916 What do you think about extreme sports? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 125
118915 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 84
118914 The good news ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 3
118913 Can goals help to change your life? How? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 168
118912 I wish live with my grandmother ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 117
118911 What do you think is the hardest job in the world? Explain your... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 139
118910 Should poor people be punished for stealing if they are stealing... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 0
118909 Korean chicken ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 56
118908 What do you think is the hardest job in the world? Explain your... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 0
118907 I can remember one scene ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 93
118906 If tomorrow is the end of the world, what will you do today? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 115
118905 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 62
118904 About the tattoos. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 57
118903 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 72
118902 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 63
118901 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 69
118900 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 75
118899 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04