¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task(Jul 4th, 2022)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-07-06 545

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do you think that money can buy happiness?
Yes. I think that money can buy happiness. the meaning of that,as far as I define it as, is that I can be happy with money.
No. Actually, everyone knows "MONEY CAN BUY HAPPINESS" And the more I have, the happier I would be. Some people say "Money can not make us happy itself. There's something more important than money". However, the chances are the people who say this must be the ones who don't have enough and don't even try to earn more money, sacrificing their instant gratifications and paying the price.
And this is what I heard on a YouTube clip on the way home today, in the evening. We know dozens of people who are kind to everyone and help others with their full heart. But it is obvious that most of them are poor or live under the average life, in the aspects of how much money they have.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, U Seung! 

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this one. Have a good rest!

~T. Roanne ^_^
===================================================
Yes. I think that money can buy happiness. 
>> Correct! 
the meaning of that,as far as I define it as, is that I can be happy with money.
>> The meaning of that, as far as I define it as, is that I can be happy with money.
No. Actually, everyone knows "MONEY CAN BUY HAPPINESS" And the more I have, the happier I would be. 
>> No. Actually, everyone knows "MONEY CAN BUY HAPPINESS" And the more I have, the happier I would be. 
Some people say "Money can not make us happy itself. 
>> Correct! 
There's something more important than money". 
>> Correct! 
However, the chances are the people who say this must be the ones who don't have enough and don't even try to earn more money, sacrificing their instant gratifications and paying the price.
>> Correct! 
And this is what I heard on a YouTube clip on the way home today, in the evening. 
>> Correct! 
We know dozens of people who are kind to everyone and help others with their full heart. 
>> Correct! 
But it is obvious that most of them are poor or live under the average life, in the aspects of how much money they have.
>> Correct! 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122692 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 2427
122691 How has your health changed when you were younger compared to... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1664
122690 Do you think colors affect your mood? How? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 2161
122689 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1755
122688 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1482
122687 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1
122686 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1743
122685 What benefits and drawbacks do you think working abroad has? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1590
122684 Distance ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 0
122683 Hi Gemma ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1774
122682 media ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 2568
122681 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1729
122680 How do you stay cool in the summer? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1
122679 9/28 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1488
122678 Food ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 1565
122677 09.28.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 2
122676 Home ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 1425
122675 9/28 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 1683
122674 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 2014
122673 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04