¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Looking back on your life so far, talk about a time when you exercised your independence—perha

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-07-04 729

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I left my home when I was 20 years old. My university is really far from my hometown which takes about 3 hours by a train and a car. I asked my parents to rent a house for me because I needed to spend a lot of time in the public transportations. However, my parents were not able to support me due to financial problem. Fortunately, one of my friend would like to leave his home, so we decided to live together near my school. We encountered a lot of problem but we could overcome it because we were quite young. It is not a good memory, but I can say that it helps me a lot to construct my personality. There are many advantages living alone. I know how to cook, do laundry and I am good at washing dishe but there is some disadvantages. I sometimes feel lonely and miss my mom's food. I thought it is kind of my strength but my mother in law didn't think it is worth experience for her daughter because she wanted her daughter to get married with someone who were living under the harmonious family

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I left my home when I was 20 years old. 
>> CORRECT!
My university is really far from my hometown which takes about 3 hours by a train and a car. 
>> CORRECT!
I asked my parents to rent a house for me because I needed to spend a lot of time in the public transportations. 
>> I asked my parents to rent a house for me because I needed to spend a lot of time in using public transportations. 
However, my parents were not able to support me due to financial problem. 
>> However, my parents were not able to support me due to financial problems. 
Fortunately, one of my friend would like to leave his home, so we decided to live together near my school. 
>> Fortunately, one of my friends would like to leave his home, so we decided to live together near my school. 
We encountered a lot of problem but we could overcome it because we were quite young. It is not a good memory, but I can say that it helps me a lot to construct my personality. 
>> CORRECT!
There are many advantages living alone. 
>> CORRECT!
I know how to cook, do laundry and I am good at washing dishe but there is some disadvantages. 
>> I know how to cook, do laundry, and I am good at washing dishes, but there are also some disadvantages. 
I sometimes feel lonely and miss my mom's food. 
>> CORRECT!
I thought it is kind of my strength but my mother in law didn't think it is worth experience for her daughter because she wanted her daughter to get married with someone who were living under the harmonious family
>> I thought it is one of my strengths but my mother-in-law didn't think it is a worthy experience for her daughter because she wanted her daughter to get married with someone who lives in a harmonious family.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120230 What is the scariest story that you know? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 214
120229 What is a memorable food that you ate in a different country? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 3
120228 The discovery of fire. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 218
120227 IELTS part2 ÇÔ*¸® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 2
120226 6/27 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 232
120225 What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small... ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 588
120224 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 0
120223 What was your dream job when you were young? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 390
120222 What¡¯s the best way to stop being bored? Answer in 5 sentences... ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 435
120221 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 264
120220 Some people do not like to talk about politics. How about you,... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 919
120219 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 563
120218 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 391
120217 About friends ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 3
120216 What do you think is the best age to be? Explain your opinion. ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 4
120215 How do you think the discovery of fire changed the life of... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 506
120214 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 1
120213 The reason why there are generally few women in top positions. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 450
120212 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 565
120211 Homework {06/27} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 109

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04